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Weekly devotionals based on soul tending in the book of Psalms.

How Am I Hard-Wired To Worship? Psalm 95

/ Anthea Kotlan / 2 Comments

Our arms were raised. Our voices united in song. Suddenly I felt a shift in the room as the Holy Spirit flooded the sanctuary with His presence. While I detected fresh power moving about, I found myself utterly focused and engaged in worshipping God. Nothing else mattered. No longer multi-tasking.  I no longer considered the schedule of the event I led. I became keenly aware of the closeness I felt to God. When I picked up the microphone, I couldn’t help but testify to what I just experienced. 

Worship can become contagious in all the best possible ways. Others attending the service that evening also felt the change. Some were ushered into God’s presence. 

Donald S. Whitney in his book, “Spiritual Disciplines for the Christian Life” says, 

To worship God is to ascribe proper worth to God, to magnify His worthiness or praise, or better to approach or address God as He is worthy. As the sovereign judge, to whom we must give an account, He is worthy of all the honor we can give Him and then infinitely more. 

Worship is a spiritual discipline hard-wired into the core of our being. It is what God’s creation is designed to do. However, God wants us to choose and offer it freely. Worship requires intentionality and focus. Each participant can choose to actively take part or be distracted by other activities. 

Psalm 95 calls God’s people to worship. 

1 Come, let us sing for joy to the Lord; let us shout aloud to the Rock of our salvation. 
Psalm 95:1 NIV

Sing and Shout  

God gifted me with a voice that I can use to sing or speak or even shout. Singing and shouting to the Rock of our salvation, singing along with hymns or contemporary Christian music can provide an easy way for me to worship God. The lyrics help me recall God’s character and ways of doing things. Musical worship can be done in a church service in a building with great acoustics. It can be done in my living room with my small group. It can also be done with me alone in my car singing as loud as I would like. 

2 Let us come before him with thanksgiving and extol him with music and song. 
Psalm 95:2 NIV

Give Thanks 

Another way to worship God is to spend time giving thanks for all He has done for me and my people. I tend to easily make a list of all I don’t have. However, what a wonderful way to focus on God by giving thanks to God for all He has done today, this week, or recently.   

One practical way to create a thanksgiving list is to go through the alphabet and try to think of a thing to give thanks for featuring each letter of the alphabet.  

1.     Avocados 

2.     Beautiful weather 

3.     Cameras to capture photos of those I love… 

3 For the Lord is the great God, the great King above all gods. 
4 In his hand are the depths of the earth, and the mountain peaks belong to him. 
5 The sea is his, for he made it, and his hands formed the dry land. 
6 Come, let us bow down in worship, let us kneel before the Lord our Maker; 
Psalm 95:3-6 NIV

Bow Down in Worship 

Physical activities help remind me of certain truths. When I bow or kneel before God, I remember that He is God, and I am not. Bowing or kneeling can be physical acts of surrender. While I certainly am not required to kneel or bow, sometimes it is a wonderful way to focus my attention. It is much harder to try to check my phone or take notice of those around me when I am kneeling or bowing with my head down. The Lord my maker knows the struggles I have with distraction and anxiety. He offers this posture to help me with my heart’s desire to wander off. 

7 for he is our God and we are the people of his pasture, the flock under his care. Today, if only you would hear his voice, 
8 “Do not harden your hearts as you did at Meribah, as you did that day at Massah in the wilderness, 
9 where your ancestors tested me; they tried me, though they had seen what I did. 
10 For forty years I was angry with that generation; I said, ‘They are a people whose hearts go astray, and they have not known my ways.’ 
11 So I declared on oath in my anger, ‘They shall never enter my rest.’” 

  Psalm 95:7-11 NIV

Listen with My Ears and a Tender Heart 

After they left Egypt, the Israelites wandered in the desert at Meribah where they ran out of water. Fear and anxiety fed a wave of grumbling and complaining that cascaded through the camp. Grumbling hardens hearts and stops up ears. God’s people couldn’t hear the clear directive God gave in His provision of water to come from a rock. Moses was asked to bring water out of a rock for the people and the livestock. (Numbers 20)  

Moses chose not to listen to God and allowed his heart to be hardened by the people’s complaining. In anger, Moses tried getting water out of the rock in his own way. His disobedience and failure to worship God for what he was going to provide had long-lasting consequences.  

Worship matters because it shapes our souls.  

Lent can be a wonderful season to try different spiritual disciplines. Worship could be an ideal one to work on this week by reading and praying through a worship psalm like 95. Some other worship psalms to examine would be:  

24, 27, 36, 98, 102, 103, 104 & 110 

Psalms provide a beautiful blueprint for praise and worship. Try one on for size this week and watch to see how your heart and mind might be transformed.  

Far more often than I care to admit, I do not prioritize soul care. Worship can be a great way to access some soul refreshment. I would love to hear how you practice worship this week.

Prayer 

Lord, expand my capacity for greater worship. Help me to spend time alone and with your people giving honor and glory to You. Cause me to hunger and thirst for more worship in my life. 

In Jesus’ name, 

Amen. 

Can Solitude and Silence Recalibrate My Heart? Psalm 62

/ Anthea Kotlan / 2 Comments
A woman sitting alone on a bench.

On the third Sunday of Lent (3/20/22), Anglican churches all over the world prayed this prayer.  

Heavenly Father, you made us for yourself, and our hearts are restless until they rest in you: Look with compassion upon the heartfelt desires of your servants, and purify our disordered affections, that we may behold your eternal glory in the face of Christ Jesus; who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God for ever and ever. Amen. 

Collect for the 3rd Sunday of Lent – ACNA BCP 2019 

  • our hearts are restless until they rest in you 
  • look with compassion upon the heartfelt desires of your servants 
  • purify our disordered affections  

These phrases jumped off the page. The third week of lent, the halfway point, is a time when the enthusiasm of giving up something for this 40-day season may have waned. I feel a bit done with being done with something I enjoy. I am seeking valid reasons to press the pause button and question the validity of my pitiful sacrifice. After all, what difference does it make? My restless heart is running wild. 

There it is listed in the prayer: restless hearts and disordered affections.  

What does my restless heart need during this Lenten midpoint? What does it look like to rest in God? Do I finally have spiritual justification for a nap? It certainly does wonders for my grandchildren. What about my disordered affections. Do I too often love what is not suitable for my soul? Do I prioritize things or people over God? 

The spiritual discipline of silence and solitude might be something to test drive. It could be a way to:

  • find true rest 
  • spend time under God’s compassionate gaze 
  • have my disordered affections sorted out 

Donald S. Whitney in his book, ”Spiritual Disciplines for the Christian Life,” says, 

“The simple act of silence before the Lord, as opposed to coming to Him in a wordy fret, can be a demonstration of faith in Him.”  

In Psalm 62, David seeks God from a posture of silence and solitude. 

1 Truly my soul finds rest in God; my salvation comes from him. 
2 Truly he is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will never be shaken. 
3 How long will you assault me? Would all of you throw me down—this leaning wall, this tottering fence? 
4 Surely they intend to topple me from my lofty place; they take delight in lies. With their mouths they bless, but in their hearts they curse. 
Psalm 62:1-4 NIV

While I am not under attack from an earthly enemy, the way David often was, who or what keeps me from resting in God and spending time in solitude and silence? 

Technology intrudes on almost every moment of my waking hours. 

It is hard to disconnect and take time alone with God. I am constantly monitoring my cell phone because someone might need me. Because it is all at the touch of a button, I find myself continually checking weather updates, news headlines, and updates on friends and family. The situation cuts the other way too. Have you ever received an irritated message because you failed to respond to a voicemail, text message, or status update immediately? In recent years reasonable response times have shrunk to minutes, not even hours.  

I set a timer for 10 minutes this morning and sat in a chair on my back porch. I refused to pick up my phone until the timer went off. I intentionally chose to sit because it meant I was doing nothing. It would be too easy to get some steps in or begin weeding my patio plants. Those ten minutes ticked by slowly, and the chattering monkeys came to visit. Landscaping ideas ping-ponged into my brain, and I counted puddles of water around my yard left from the storm that swept through last night. I pushed those thoughts gently away and tried to clear my mind of nothing but God. I had to do this more than once. 

“What do you want me to know, Lord?” I sat and pondered. 

Ten minutes of silence is much longer than I expected. But, I did begin to hear the Lord’s still, small voice telling me He loves me, and I don’t have to do things for him to earn His love.  

Do I find silence and solitude hard? Yes 

Is it hard to put down my phone because there might be an emergency? Yes 

Do I feel the need to be available to my people 24/7? Yes, so much.  

God knows this. He has David remind me of the only place I can rest from the futile attempt to be all things to all people. 

5 Yes, my soul, find rest in God; my hope comes from him. 
6 Truly, he is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will not be shaken. 
7 My salvation and my honor depend on God; he is my mighty rock, my refuge. 
8 Trust in him at all times, you people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge. 
Psalm 62:5-8 NIV

Verse 5 sounds like a conversation I might need to have. I must remind my soul to find rest in God again and again and again.  Hope will naturally follow this practice because I will regain God’s perspective. I will no longer believe the lie that it is all up to me. This soul recalibration helps me gain God’s wisdom and insight.  

If God is my rock, salvation, and fortress, I will not be shaken by external storms like bad news updates or internal fears and anxieties. I can pour out all my worries and then sit in silence, knowing He will care for every single concern I have. He will do it with abundance because He is the God of the universe, and I am not.  

9 Surely the lowborn are but a breath, the highborn are but a lie. If weighed on a balance, they are nothing; together they are only a breath. 
10 Do not trust in extortion or put vain hope in stolen goods; though your riches increase, 
    do not set your heart on them. 
Psalm 62:9-10 NIV

These two verses also remind me that God is fair. Even when I don’t see justice, He works in unseen ways. While an evil earthly tyrant might try to take possession of an entire country on the other side of the world, God is still working behind the scenes for His purposes. God can and will bring provision. That is not up to me.  

11 One thing God has spoken, two things I have heard: “Power belongs to you, God, 
12     and with you, Lord, is unfailing love”; and, “You reward everyone according to what they have done.”
Psalm 62:11-12 NIV

Finally, these two verses speak to how well God knows His children. First, these things are so vital for us to hear God will send the message more than once. Second, God has all the power, and I do not. I can relax in knowing it is not up to me to fix everything, care for everyone, and do and do until I collapse in exhaustion.  

God’s love for me does not fail, and it fills me with His love for others. Solitude and silence with God will re-order my affections. I no longer strain to love those I find hard to enjoy. God can fill me with His love for others if I draw near. I don’t have to try harder or do more.  

God is ultimately the only fair judge in this world. He will reward everyone according to their deeds. In verse 12, God’s mercy and justice sit together. God does not give us what we deserve, but instead, He empowers us to do what He calls us to do. Will I obediently do what He has called me to and promised to help me do? Or will I continue to strive based on my strength?  

Verse 12 could appear to contradict what God spoke to me today. However, God does not need me to do anything for him. Doing is not how I find my value. He has it all done and covered. However, he chooses to partner with each of us in his projects and works. When I come right beside Him, the yoke is easy and the burden light (Matthew 11:28-30). He rewards me with that joyful participation as He recalibrates my weary heart.  

Spending time in solitude and silence might help me hear from God more clearly. Of course, for me, it might only come in small increments of 10-minute sessions, but perhaps I can build on that?  

How about you? How do you find solitude and silence? 

Are Your Prayers Plugged into the Power Source? Psalm 19

/ Anthea Kotlan / 3 Comments

(A plug is being plugged into a wall power outlet.)

Sometimes when the power goes out at my house, I have a terrible habit of continuously trying to turn the lights on. Then, as I move about the house and get busy working on other things, I forget about the lack of electricity. I keep doing this repeated action and almost seemed surprised by the outcome every single time.  

If I decided to stand in my kitchen and keep flipping the light switch on in a “try harder attempt” to overcome that lack of electrical current flowing into my home, most observers would be concerned for my sanity. No amount of turning on the light will cause the bulb to be illuminated without access to electricity.  

Sometimes my approach to prayer can look a great deal like this exercise in futility. I pray, but I get distracted, confused, concerned, and defeated. How often am I simply approaching prayer with little preparation?  

Are my prayers plugged into the power source God has provided? In my case, not always. If I am being honest, not very often at all. I want to complete my prayer tasks rapidly in the name of efficiency. I want to move through a list of requests and check them off. And yet I struggle… 

So, what is the power source?  

Before I can plug into God’s powerful provision, I need to review some basic communication principles. Prayer is, after all, my communication with God. So how does God speak to His people? How do I hear from Him? 

Psalm 19 points to one way God speaks: through his glorious creation.  

1 The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of his hands. 
2 Day after day they pour forth speech; night after night they reveal knowledge. 
3 They have no speech, they use no words; no sound is heard from them. 
4 Yet their voice goes out into all the earth, their words to the ends of the world. In the heavens God has pitched a tent for the sun. 
5     It is like a bridegroom coming out of his chamber, like a champion rejoicing to run his course. 
6 It rises at one end of the heavens and makes its circuit to the other; nothing is deprived of its warmth. 
Psalm 19:1-6 NIV

In His kindness, God also speaks through the Bible.   

7 The law of the Lord is perfect, refreshing the soul. The statutes of the Lord are trustworthy, 
    making wise the simple. 
8 The precepts of the Lord are right, giving joy to the heart. The commands of the Lord are radiant, giving light to the eyes. 
9 The fear of the Lord is pure, enduring forever. The decrees of the Lord are firm, and all of them are righteous. 
10 They are more precious than gold, than much pure gold; they are sweeter than honey, than honey from the honeycomb. 
Psalm 19:7-10 NIV

Every sunset, sunrise, mountain vista, or starry sky speaks volumes for God and His character. God reveals Himself in the world He placed His people in. If I choose to notice, I can take in God’s stunning creation every single day. 

In His kindness, God also speaks through the Bible.  

God’s word provides warnings, guidance, and soul nourishment. It refreshes the soul. Since He created me, He knows exactly what my limitations are. God knows what I need and what would be best for me to avoid. The Bible overflows with gifts for me, but I must open them. Also, and perhaps the part I have so often missed, I must take time to meditate on God’s word.  

Sadly, the secular world has hijacked the notion of meditation and perverted it into something to avoid at all costs. While Eastern meditation practices are not tools for me to use, the practice of meditation itself is neutral. It all depends on the focus of my meditating mind. Spending time focusing on God and His word is a way for me to tend my soul and plug into the power source God has provided. Taking time out of my busy schedule to sit and dwell in God’s presence as I read or listen to His word provides a needed reset.  

11 By them your servant is warned; in keeping them there is great reward. 
12 But who can discern their own errors? Forgive my hidden faults. 
13 Keep your servant also from willful sins; may they not rule over me. Then I will be blameless, innocent of great transgression. 
Psalm 19:11-13 NIV

Focused time in God’s word can keep me on track with His will and serve as a warning when I go off course. God’s word brings ongoing transformation.  

14 May these words of my mouth and this meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer. 
Psalm 19:14 NIV

This final verse from Psalm 19 is a pattern for powerful prayer. Donald S. Whitney, in his book on spiritual disciplines, explains, “…meditation was a catalyst that catapulted David (the author this Psalm 19) from the truth of God into talking with God.” Taking time to process the input of God’s word steeps my heart and mind with His presence. Continually repeating this process with a daily intake of scripture begins to change me from the inside out. My prayers will transform because I will want what God wants. My mind will shift because I will think about what God thinks about. My heart will change, and I will enjoy what God wants.  

The psalms can provide an ideal starting point for meditation that leads into prayer. Each psalm provides both a focus for meditation and a written prayer. For example, read Psalm 19 to begin and ask the Holy Spirit to highlight one verse or phrase.

Ways to Meditate on Scripture

  • Read the psalm a second or third or fourth time 
  • Read the psalm in different versions of the Bible 
  • Listen to someone else read it to you 
  • Look for a song that features the passage of scripture you chose 
  • Try drawing a picture or painting something from the psalm 
  • Read each line, pausing and listening for God to speak between each one 
  • Ask the Holy Spirit to show you something fresh and new hidden in the text  

 

Prayers prayed after a meditation time will be more focused and have greater clarity. This exercise will increase confidence in prayer. My heart is instructed by the truths found in scripture.  

How about you? Do you meditate on scripture before you pray? What passages of scripture do you use? I would love to hear about your experiences.  

During Lent 2022, I’m writing about one spiritual discipline each week. What kinds of spiritual disciplines are you taking on this season?

Should I Fear Fasting? Psalm 35

/ Anthea Kotlan / Leave a comment
empty plate with fork and spoon crossed

During the season of Lent, there can be many calls to use fasting as a spiritual discipline.

  • no red meat on fridays
  • stay off social media
  • pick one thing you really love and give it up for the season

In most Christian circles you will rarely hear fasting mentioned, and few will have read anything about it. And yet it’s mentioned in Scripture more times than even something as important as baptism (about seventy-seven times for fasting to seventy-five for baptism).

Donald S. Whitney
“Spiritual Disciplines for the Christian Life”


 

I was afraid to fast.

I grew up in a home where disordered eating played as a background playlist on loop. To this day, my mother will evaluate my food intake. Anxiety, an honored guest, typically joins my mother and me for every meal we share. Am I eating enough? Have I ordered something that meets her approval? If we go out to a restaurant, I can expect her to suggest I help her eat the food on her plate because surely it is too much for her. I must help finish what she can’t see wasting.

Second, only to my mother’s food anxiety, comes my mother’s health anxiety. Let’s just say, I may have been raised with the idea that my body lacked certain abilities to deal with everyday stresses. My blood sugar was far too unstable. My coordination and physical strength were things I simply couldn’t expect to have. I could easily get hurt doing normal things. So, skipping a meal or two was far too risky. Ironically, it was during a time when I was preparing for surgery that I discovered I could miss a meal or two or three without passing out or experiencing some other dire consequences.

To be clear fasting is not only about giving up food. God may call His followers to give up any number of things. In this piece, I will be focusing on fasting from food, but there are many other ways to fast.

For years, fasting food, as a spiritual discipline, was not available to me.  Recently, God made it clear that He wanted me to learn to trust Him in this area. He gently called me out of a toxic dependence on avoiding fasting out of fear.

Unhooking toxic disordered eating patterns from the invitation to fast from food challenged me to even greater dependence upon God. Asking the Holy Spirit to examine my heart and check my motivations became essential.  I am continuing to disconnect fasting from becoming a weight-loss tool for me. The struggle is indeed real for many believers caught up in diet culture as I was for decades.

“Fasting from any nourishment, activity, involvement or pursuit—for any season—sets the stage for God to appear. Fasting is not a tool to pry wisdom out of God’s hands or to force needed insight about a decision. Fasting is not a tool for gaining discipline or developing piety (whatever that might be). Instead, fasting is the bulimic act of ridding ourselves of our fullness to attune our senses to the mysteries that swirl in and around us.”

Dan B. Allender, PHD

As Dr. Dan Allender explains, what I gained from fasting was an opportunity to attune my heart to God’s heart.  

Saul, David’s mortal enemy, pursued him for decades. In Psalm 35, David cries out to God for help and support.

1 Contend, Lord, with those who contend with me; fight against those who fight against me.
2 Take up shield and armor; arise and come to my aid.
3 Brandish spear and javelin against those who pursue me. Say to me, “I am your salvation.”

4 May those who seek my life be disgraced and put to shame; may those who plot my ruin
    be turned back in dismay.
5 May they be like chaff before the wind, with the angel of the Lord driving them away;
6 may their path be dark and slippery, with the angel of the Lord pursuing them.

7 Since they hid their net for me without cause and without cause dug a pit for me,
8 may ruin overtake them by surprise—may the net they hid entangle them, may they fall into the pit, to their ruin.
9 Then my soul will rejoice in the Lord and delight in his salvation.
10 My whole being will exclaim, “Who is like you, Lord? You rescue the poor from those too strong for them, the poor and needy from those who rob them.”
Psalm 35:1-10 NIV

David found himself fully relying on God’s ability to rescue him. His desperation draws him closer and closer to God.

11 Ruthless witnesses come forward; they question me on things I know nothing about.
12 They repay me evil for good and leave me like one bereaved.
13 Yet when they were ill, I put on sackcloth and humbled myself with fasting. When my prayers returned to me unanswered,
14 I went about mourning as though for my friend or brother. I bowed my head in grief as though weeping for my mother.
15 But when I stumbled, they gathered in glee; assailants gathered against me without my knowledge. They slandered me without ceasing.
16 Like the ungodly they maliciously mocked; they gnashed their teeth at me.

Psalm 35:11-16 NIV

In verse 13, David talks about how fasting brings about humility and causes a heart shift. Fasting attunes hearts to what God cares about. The enemies remain, and David continues his lament and mourning. However, David feels his heart shift from anger to empathy. He begins to mourn and weep for his enemies. Only God could bring such a change.

While David’s attitude toward his enemies shifts in profound way, his enemies continue along the same path of vengeance. They mock and slander him when he stumbles.

17 How long, Lord, will you look on? Rescue me from their ravages, my precious life from these lions.
18 I will give you thanks in the great assembly; among the throngs I will praise you.
19 Do not let those gloat over me who are my enemies without cause; do not let those who hate me without reason maliciously wink the eye.
20 They do not speak peaceably, but devise false accusations against those who live quietly in the land.
21 They sneer at me and say, “Aha! Aha! With our own eyes we have seen it.”
Psalm 35:17-21 NIV

David’s enemies are relentless in their bad behavior. Somewhere between these verses, David chooses a different response from what surrounds him. He promises to praise God. Even after he declares this he continues to be surrounded by false accusations and sneering. His promise to praise reveals a spark of hope being fanned into a flame of passion.  

22 LORD, you have seen this; do not be silent. Do not be far from me, Lord.
23 Awake, and rise to my defense! Contend for me, my God and Lord.
24 Vindicate me in your righteousness, LORD my God; do not let them gloat over me.
25 Do not let them think, “Aha, just what we wanted!” or say, “We have swallowed him up.”
26 May all who gloat over my distress be put to shame and confusion; may all who exalt themselves over me be clothed with shame and disgrace.
27 May those who delight in my vindication shout for joy and gladness; may they always say, “The LORD be exalted, who delights in the well-being of his servant.”
28 My tongue will proclaim your righteousness, your praises all day long.

Psalm 35:22-28 NIV

David praises God amid pain and offers these praises all day long. In Psalm 35 David moves from lamenting his hopeless situation to proclaiming God’s righteousness and praising Him all day.

Choosing to fast can powerfully propel me into a closeness with God’s heart and His desires for me. In this position of dependence, I become more attuned to what God delights in despite my circumstances. The Lord begins to allow me to catch a glimpse of some of the mysteries that swirl inside. My empathy grows for others and bonds me even more closely with God and His heart for all He created. Fasting is both a tool and a gift from my heavenly father. He knows exactly what I need.

What experience do you have with fasting food as a spiritual tool? What questions do you have about fasting? Have you chosen to fast from something this Lent?

A Mark To Remember -Psalm 103

/ Anthea Kotlan / Leave a comment
(A cross shape on top of ashes)

Photos, awards, a folded American flag, certificates, and various hats revealed a life well-lived in the service of others and God. This table of remembrance, set up near the chapel entrance, displayed things representing my friend’s father’s life. Attending a memorial service brings a stark reminder of what is left behind after someone dies.

What are the only two things that last into eternity?

People and the Word of God

Ash Wednesday (March 2nd) will mark the first day of the 40-day season of Lent and serves as a perfect reminder of this truth. Everything is actively passing away. My physical life on earth, my money, my house, and all my possessions will fade away sooner or later.

The Ash Wednesday service offers, “a chance to kneel and receive the mark of mortal nature,” says Fr. Thomas McKenzie in his book, The Anglican Way.

An Anglican Ash Wednesday service often inserts Psalm 103 into the liturgy. The first seven verses of Psalm 103 begin with praising God and offering perspective.

1 Praise the LORD, my soul; all my inmost being, praise his holy name.
2 Praise the LORD, my soul, and forget not all his benefits—
3 who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases,
4 who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion,
5 who satisfies your desires with good things, so that your youth is renewed like the eagle’s.
6 The LORD works righteousness, and justice for all the oppressed.
7 He made known his ways to Moses, his deeds to the people of Israel:

Psalm 103:1-7 NIV

We can praise God as we begin Lent on this Ash Wednesday because of all the benefits He provides.

  • Forgiveness
  • Healing
  • Redemption
  • Love and compassion
  • Satisfaction
  • Righteousness and Justice
  • Knowledge of His ways and deeds

God warns us not to forget them (vs. 2). Perhaps we need to create a table of remembrance in our own lives on a regular basis to keep these benefits in our minds and our hearts?

How have you seen God provide each one of these gifts recently?

The next seven verses of Psalm 103 may be shared early in the Ash Wednesday service liturgy.

8 The LORD is compassionate and gracious,  slow to anger, abounding in love.
9 He will not always accuse, nor will he harbor his anger forever;
10 he does not treat us as our sins deserve, or repay us according to our iniquities.
11 For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his love for those who fear him;
12 as far as the east is from the west,  so far has he removed our transgressions from us.
13 As a father has compassion on his children, so the LORD has compassion on those who fear him;
14 for he knows how we are formed, he remembers that we are dust.
Psalm 103:8-14 NIV

How have you seen the compassion of the Lord in your life recently?

As the Ash Wednesday service continues, a reading of the Gospel is shared, a sermon is given, and then the priest says,

“Let us now call to mind our sin and the infinite mercy of God.”

A prayer follows.

Almighty God, you have created us from the dust of the earth: Grant that these ashes may be for us a symbol of our mortality and a sign of penitence, that we may remember that it is by your grace alone that we receive the gift of eternal life in Jesus Christ our Savior. Amen.

ACNA BCP 2019 p. 545.

(Anglican Church in North America, The Book of Common Prayer published in 2019.)

Verse 14 is echoed in the liturgy when the priest marks a cross on each participant’s forehead, saying, “remember that you are dust, and to dust, you shall return.”

Such a profound and sobering declaration. This ashen cross marking announces to a watching world both our mortality and penitence as believers.

Psalm 103 continues with eight final verses contrasting our mortality on earth and God’s eternal nature.

15 The life of mortals is like grass, they flourish like a flower of the field;
16 the wind blows over it and it is gone, and its place remembers it no more.
17 But from everlasting to everlasting the Lord’s love is with those who fear him, and his righteousness with their children’s children—
18 with those who keep his covenant and remember to obey his precepts.
19 The Lord has established his throne in heaven, and his kingdom rules over all.
20 Praise the Lord, you his angels, you mighty ones who do his bidding, who obey his word.
21 Praise the Lord, all his heavenly hosts, you his servants who do his will.
22 Praise the Lord, all his works everywhere in his dominion. Praise the Lord, my soul.
Psalm 103:15-22 NIV

When I am reminded of both my mortality and the grace of eternal life through Jesus Christ, all I can do is praise Him. Like the psalmist, I truly want to praise Him with all of my soul.

During the next forty days, whether you attend an Ash Wednesday service or not, why not accept an invitation to Lent.

Lent is not a season of limitation, but instead, it is an amazing opportunity for grace and growth. Lent can be a time of Holy preparation, and an opportunity to create margin in a busy life by giving up something or taking on a life-giving practice. Fr. Thomas McKenzie says, “The disciplines are meant to empty us so the Lord may fill us.”

How will you observe the season of Lent this year?

Do you have any questions about Lent?

How Can I Respond to False Accusations? Lessons on God’s Love Learned from a Man on the Run – Psalm 18

/ Anthea Kotlan / 2 Comments
Person running away

False accusations have a way of wearing me down. Initially the truth stands guard on my heart, and I feel righteous and free and can put the lie away. However, sometimes a false accusation returns days, months or years later. Perhaps it is something with a small grain of truth that has been manipulated by the enemy? Maybe it is something to do with a fear I have?

False accusations can begin to feel like a dripping faucet, initially a small annoyance but eventually becoming something that distracts me or exhausts me. I feel I must defend myself. I need to set the record straight. I want to fight for what is right.

The culture around me reinforces messages of offense at every turn.

  • Don’t take that lying down
  • Tell everyone you know that the false accuser is wrong
  • Gather a group of people to support you and attack the accuser
  • Seek the revenge you are entitled to
  • Get the last word on the matter

While I have never been pursued by a murderous king, I can relate to David’s conflict with Saul. David faced so many false accusations from Saul. When a shepherd boy named David was anointed and chosen by God as the future King of Israel, it touched off a twenty-year conflict. The current king, Saul waged war and pursued David relentlessly. He began with false accusations and escalated the chase to a murderous rage.

What did David pursue in response to Saul?

Revenge?

Support from others?

A violent solution?

Even when David could have killed Saul, he continued to seek God, first and foremost.

On the day that David was delivered from all of His enemies (the ones Saul used against him), David wrote Psalm 18. The psalm is all about giving glory to God and never mentions Saul. In one of his first acts as the new king, David directs his new subjects to praise God. While on the run from King Saul, David had learned some hard-earned lessons about God’s character and actions.

What does David learn about God?

  1. God hears us when we call out to Him.
  2. God shows up to fight for us.
  3. God rescues us in unmistakable ways
  4. God delights in us.
1 I love you, Lord, my strength.

2 The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge,
    my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.

3 I called to the Lord, who is worthy of praise, and I have been saved from my enemies.

4 The cords of death entangled me; the torrents of destruction overwhelmed me.

5 The cords of the grave coiled around me; the snares of death confronted me.

6 In my distress I called to the Lord; I cried to my God for help. From his temple he heard my voice; my cry came before him, into his ears.

Psalm 18:1-6 NIV
  1. God hears, listens and responds (verse 6) Nothing escapes his notice, and He is willing and able to rescue. Even when we can’t see Him, He hears us and knows all about what we are struggling with.
7 The earth trembled and quaked, and the foundations of the mountains shook; they trembled because he was angry.

8 Smoke rose from his nostrils; consuming fire came from his mouth, burning coals blazed out of it.

9 He parted the heavens and came down; dark clouds were under his feet.

10 He mounted the cherubim and flew; he soared on the wings of the wind.

11 He made darkness his covering, his canopy around him—the dark rain clouds of the sky.

12 Out of the brightness of his presence clouds advanced, with hailstones and bolts of lightning.

13 The Lord thundered from heaven; the voice of the Most High resounded.

Psalm 18:7-13 NIV

2. God fights for those He loves, so we don’t need to. (Verse 13). God can balance out an unfair advantage –when a king pursues a shepherd boy with vengeance and great resource. God’s supernatural battle strategies can’t be explained away or ignored.

14 He shot his arrows and scattered the enemy, with great bolts of lightning he routed them.

15 The valleys of the sea were exposed, and the foundations of the earth laid bare at your rebuke, Lord, at the blast of breath from your nostrils.

16 He reached down from on high and took hold of me; he drew me out of deep waters.

17 He rescued me from my powerful enemy, from my foes, who were too strong for me.

18 They confronted me in the day of my disaster, but the Lord was my support.

19 He brought me out into a spacious place; he rescued me because he delighted in me.
Psalm 18:14-19 NIV

3. God draws me out of my depth, out of my way and into his firm grasp. When he rescues me, He does so in a way that defies the idea that I did it myself. His power is demonstrated for all to see. The day of my disaster (vs. 18) transforms into a day of giving thanks for God’s great merciful rescue.

4. God delights in me and you and asks me to focus on Him not my accusers or pursuers. He will take care of them for me and you.

This twenty-year conflict with Saul prepared David for one of the greatest challenges of his life – serving as the King of God’s people. During a very difficult season, David got closer to God by placing his focus on that relationship.

Today, I will take time to turn away from focusing on those who annoy or accuse me, and I will direct my energy towards giving God praise for all He does. I will pray through the first 19 verses of Psalm 18 and ask God to show me how He is always fighting for me and making provision.

Five Lessons Learned about God’s Love from a Sinner’s Situation – Psalm 51

/ Anthea Kotlan / 1 Comment
(Man praying on a hill.)

When I was in fifth grade, I peered in the mirror smiling and discovered that my teeth were coated with red dye in various shades. Plaque disclosing dye tablets had done their job. My reflection revealed a real lack of dental hygiene in my 10-year-old self. The plaque had been invisible but now the dye made it glaringly obvious.

In 2nd Samuel chapter 12, God sends Nathan to confront King David about his sin. Nathan uses a simple story about a rich man taking advantage of a poor man to help King David to see his own sins. The narrative nail is pounded into David’s heart when Nathan enquires about what consequences a rich man should receive for slaughtering the poor man’s only lamb. David begins to list various severe punishments for the rich perpetrator and then Nathan adds, “You are that rich man.”

A sin-disclosing tablet is dropped into David’s life, and he is utterly overcome with the length and breadth of his sins. The consequences of his moral failings unleash some far-reaching results. Regret and humility spur David to pen Psalm 51 as a piece of lament.

What can I learn about love from a sinner’s lament about love?

1 Have mercy on me, O God, according to your unfailing love; according to your great compassion blot out my transgressions.
Psalm 51:1 NIV



1 God’s love comes first and foremost, even before I am forgiven. God’s love doesn’t give up but continues relentlessly to bring restoration and transformation.
2 Wash away all my iniquity and cleanse me from my sin.
3 For I know my transgressions, and my sin is always before me.
Psalm 51:2-3 NIV

When David pursued a relationship with a married woman named Bathsheba, his sin was somehow not “before him”.

When David had Bathsheba’s husband murdered on the battlefront, so he could marry her, David refused to see his sin.

While David continued to choose sin over loving and obeying God, his desire to please himself, no matter the cost, grew.

Did the growing pile of sins obscure David’s view of his own guilt?

A lack of ability to see sin does not make it any less damaging. The consequences of David’s sin were significant and even deadly. And yet, God had mercy.

2. God’s mercy is borne out of His love for us.

It was out of mercy that the Lord sent Nathan to rebuke David. God sometimes places prophets in our lives or calls our friends to serve in a prophetic way. Has God ever sent a prophet to speak truth into your life?

David couldn’t see his sin, and then he did see all of it. He was devastated.

4 Against you, you only, have I sinned and done what is evil in your sight; so you are right in your verdict and justified when you judge.

5 Surely I was sinful at birth, sinful from the time my mother conceived me.

6 Yet you desired faithfulness even in the womb; you taught me wisdom in that secret place.

Psalm 51:4-6 NIV
  • 3. As my heart is filled with God’s love, my sensitivity to sin is restored. Conviction cuts deep, but God’s grace flows more. 

Reading through Psalm 51 reveals a rinse and repeat theme. Sin is ever-present and must be continually dealt with. In order to remain sensitive to sin, I must commit to regular confession. 

7 Cleanse me with hyssop, and I will be clean; wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.

8 Let me hear joy and gladness; let the bones you have crushed rejoice.

9 Hide your face from my sins and blot out all my iniquity.

10 Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me.

Psalm 51:7-10 NIV

Repentant sinners are in desperate need of renewal. God is gracious enough to provide a deep soul reset whenever we ask Him.

11 Do not cast me from your presence or take your Holy Spirit from me.

12 Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.

13 Then I will teach transgressors your ways, so that sinners will turn back to you.

14 Deliver me from the guilt of bloodshed, O God, you who are God my Savior,
    and my tongue will sing of your righteousness.
Psalm 51:11-14 NIV
  • 4. God’s love and mercy blot out my transgressions and empower me to obey Him and teach others about His love.  
15 Open my lips, Lord, and my mouth will declare your praise.

16 You do not delight in sacrifice, or I would bring it; you do not take pleasure in burnt offerings.

17 My sacrifice, O God, is a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart
    you, God, will not despise.

18 May it please you to prosper Zion, to build up the walls of Jerusalem.

19 Then you will delight in the sacrifices of the righteous, in burnt offerings offered whole; then bulls will be offered on your altar.
Psalm 51:15-19 NIV
  • 5 God’s love can be reciprocated with praise from a contrite heart and broken spirit.

David penned some of the greatest pieces of praise and lament in the Psalms. Surely his creativity and passion were fueled by his humility and repentance. For me, those plaque disclosing tablets taught me a valuable lesson. I saw my failure in dental hygiene and was able to take corrective action before I lost some of my teeth due to my own negligence. Sometimes I wish there were sin-revealing tablets to reveal my hidden sins. It is far too easy to become blind to my own moral failings. It is far too easy to become hard-hearted towards sin.

The good news is God loves me too much to allow me to remain in ignorance. He has provided the Holy Spirit to help me shine a light into every part of my heart and soul. On a regular basis, God calls me to do an inventory of my soul and root out sin.

Reading back through a repentance psalm like 51 gives me an opportunity to prayerfully consider what I might need to confess. Other penitential psalms to consider reading and praying through are Psalms 6, 31, 37, and 101.

Ultimately God’s love provides a pathway to reveal our sin. God’s generous provision through Jesus makes a way for reconciliation and renewal.

Four Love Lessons from Toddlers – Psalm 100

/ Anthea Kotlan / 2 Comments
A toddler holding an action figure.

Toddlers love hard. They love their toys, their friends, and their people.

This last weekend my son-in-law, a youth minister, was away all weekend for the annual youth retreat. My two-year-old granddaughter, Margaret, missed him so much that she insisted on going to bed each night with his photo clutched in her tiny hand.

On Sunday at church, I saw my grandnephew, also aged two, and he had a small plastic farmer clutched in his hand. My niece smiled and explained this toy had been renamed, Daddy. Evidently, Daddy had been in Cooper’s hand all weekend.

So, what can toddlers and Psalm 100 teach me about love? How can soul tending in Psalm 100 help me love God?

The psalmist begins with a command.

1 Make a joyful noise to the LORD, all the earth! 
Psalm 100:1 ESV
  1. Make a joyful noise.

Begin each day by making a joyful noise to the Lord. I have to appreciate that God does not ask me simply to sing because He knows sometimes, I can’t sing that well. I might miss the note or mix up the verses. God wants to hear from me anyway because He commands it.

Have you ever watched a toddler sing? It’s a full-body experience typically with hand motions both learned and made up. Watching the way Margaret sings, without a care in the world, reminds me of how God wants me to make a joyful noise to Him.

God commands me and all the earth to sing to Him because He knows we all need more joy in our lives. God designed us to make joyful noises. It was all part of the original blueprint. Belting out a song, without any care for who is listening, beside the Lord, is a great way to connect with our Abba Daddy God. Can I set aside a few minutes today to make joyful noises to please Him?

2     Serve the LORD with gladness!
    Come into his presence with singing! 
Psalm 100:2 ESV

2. Sing while you serve.

One of my best grandma skills is making up silly songs. Whenever we need to clean up toys, wash hands, or go to bed, I have a song I sing with Margaret and her little brother, Ian. Toddlers don’t naturally love to serve but singing while we do something brings smiles and giggles every time.  

I think Snow White’s dwarfs might well have been onto something, “Whistle While You Work”. For God’s children of any age serving while singing or whistling can be a great way to love the task you set your hands to. God calls me to serve Him, and He requires I do it with gladness not grudgingly. For a watching and wondering world, my service to God is a testimony that far exceeds the words that I say. If I appear to be serving God out of a sense of obligation or in a way to please other people, it’s a poor witness.

What song can you sing to find joy in serving today?

3 Know that the LORD, he is God!
    It is he who made us, and we are his;
    we are his people, and the sheep of his pasture.

Psalm 100:3 ESV

3. Know God

Toddlers know what they love, and they certainly love what they know. Therefore, toddlers, just like me, love a well-kept schedule and predictable rhythms in their lives. When Daddy is gone working at the youth retreat, in Margaret’s case, or working extra shifts in law enforcement, in Cooper’s case, clinging to a familiar object that they know reminds them of Daddy really helps.

We all need frequent reminders to hold onto in times of uncertainty. As children of God, holding onto scripture, listening to worship music, and spending time at church help us know God. What can you cling to this week to remind you to love God?

4 Enter his gates with thanksgiving,
    and his courts with praise!
    Give thanks to him; bless his name!
Psalm 100:4 ESV

4 Say thank you, please.

Saying thank you is not something that most toddlers do without prompting. I have often found myself saying, “Say thank you, please.”

The question becomes, which came first? Giving thanks or being grateful? Could it be that the more I give thanks, the more grateful I become? The more I list all God has blessed me with, the more I see He has done?

Entire books and social media campaigns have been created on the concept of thankfulness and how the practice can grow greater appreciation in hearts and minds. (See “One Thousand Gifts” by Ann Voskamp to learn more.) Sometimes, Margaret and I spend time taking turns thanking God for family members and friends. The list often goes on and on.

5 For the LORD is good;
    his steadfast love endures forever,
    and his faithfulness to all generations.
Psalm 100:5 ESV

1 John 4:19 say, “we love because He first loved us.” When my daughters were preschoolers, they both attended Bible Study Fellowship, and there they learned many songs. The one they both sang with gusto was “We love because He first loved us.” It was an incredibly simple song with plenty of repetition, just the kind toddlers love.

We love God in response to God’s steadfast love. His love for each of us is not based on what we have done or how well we do it. It is all about God pursuing each of us with his relentless and sacrificial love that lasts forever for all generations, especially those toddlers.

Am I Operating My Life Beyond God’s Design Capacity? Psalm 32

/ Anthea Kotlan / Leave a comment

During Hurricane Harvey, the Houston area received close to sixty inches of rain. Water drainage experts design all kinds of landscaping features to mitigate flooding in the Houston area. The fountains and lakes you see as you enter a subdivision are beautifully disguised flood mitigation features. However, no amount of these features could manage Harvey’s furor. Five feet of water, arriving over four days, caused irreparable damage. The sheer weight of water forced Houston to sink an inch lower, and it was beyond the design capacity for the area.

Soul tending in Psalm 32 reveals some ways in which confession and spending time in God’s presence help me to function as God designed me to. When I defy God’s design capacity I suffer, as do those around me.

1 Blessed is the one whose transgression is forgiven, whose sin is covered.
2 Blessed is the man against whom the Lord counts no iniquity, and in whose spirit there is no deceit.
3 For when I kept silent, my bones wasted away through my groaning all day long.
4 For day and night your hand was heavy upon me; my strength was dried up as by the heat of summer. Selah (Psalm 32:1-4 ESV)

“…my bones wasted away through my groanings all day long.”

Unrepented sin in my life takes me beyond God’s design capacity. I was not built to carry sin long-term in my spirit. The weight of sin wears me out physically, emotionally, and spiritually.

“Your hand was heavy on me day and night.”

Thank you, Lord, for not leaving me alone to figure it out. Out of your kindness, You came to me in the day and the night and firmly reminded me of my sin. The weight of my sin became too heavy to bear. I grew weaker on each day that I avoided confession.

5 I acknowledged my sin to you, and I did not cover my iniquity; I said, “I will confess my transgressions to the Lord,” and you forgave the iniquity of my sin. Selah (Psalm 32:5 ESV)

When I confess, acknowledge, and uncover my sins, You forgive me. When I bring it all out into the open to you, I am forgiven completely. No bargaining necessary, no sacrifices needed, and nothing I tell You is surprising or shocking. However, I need to lay it down by saying it aloud. Sometimes I need the power of the Holy Spirit to reveal to me the sins I need to confess because I simply don’t remember them all. 

6 Therefore let everyone who is godly offer prayer to you at a time when you may be found; surely in the rush of great waters, they shall not reach him. 7 You are a hiding place for me; you preserve me from trouble; you surround me with shouts of deliverance. Selah (Psalm 32:6-7 ESV)

Prayers lead to God’s presence. God’s presence leads me to find safe ground above the waves of destruction. And there I find a hiding place. In Your presence, I move from being surrounded by my enemies to a sweet place of refuge where I am surrounded by Your presence. 

8 I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you with my eye upon you. 9 Be not like a horse or a mule, without understanding, which must be curbed with bit and bridle, or it will not stay near you. Psalm 32:8-9 ESV)

When I choose to remain in Your presence instead of dashing off to do whatever I think is most important, I receive sacred instructions for my next step. Can I set aside time each day to sit and listen to You?

As someone who often struggles with little or no sense of direction, I am very aware of my need for “turn by turn directions” to know the way to go. I need to know both the direction to travel, and the manner in which You want me to travel. Shall I travel light in this season? Shall I take little on my journey? Or should I pack up for a good long while?

10 Many are the sorrows of the wicked, but steadfast love surrounds the one who trusts in the Lord.11 Be glad in the Lord, and rejoice, O righteous, and shout for joy, all you upright in heart. (Psalm 32:10-11 ESV)

Confessing sin regularly, and spending time in God’s presence daily, leads me to a greater sense of who I am created to be in Christ. I am beloved by the Lord. As I trust Him more, I begin to see I am embraced by steadfast love. The world’s standard for love is based on what I can do, what value I bring, and how I appear. God’s steadfast love is enduring and based on God’s promise-keeping, not my behavior. To be clear, this does not mean I will live a life without any suffering or hardship. Difficult situations continue to conform me to the likeness of Christ. (See the Apostle Paul for more information.)

When I clear out sin and selfishness, I see more clearly. My view of myself and God is not distorted by sin. When I fully trust God for all outcomes, I find peace that passes all understanding.

Will it all work out the way I want? No.

Will I struggle? Yes.

However, God’s presence will carry me. This causes me to be glad and rejoice in all circumstances.

Do I Know God’s Majesty? Psalm 8

/ Anthea Kotlan / 1 Comment

“Jake’s not feeling well today, so he won’t be with us.”

Without missing a beat, my three-year-old daughter said, “We should pray for him.” She grabbed our hands and bowed her head and prayed.

Even as a preschooler many years ago, her heart was full of faith and determination to take it all to the Lord. There is something so striking about a small child’s faith on display, and how it moves the heart of God.

Psalm 8 is a glorious hymn of praise.

1 O LORD, our Lord, how majestic is your name in all the earth! You have set your glory above the heavens. 2 Out of the mouth of babies and infants, you have established strength because of your foes, to still the enemy and the avenger. 3 When I look at your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars, which you have set in place, Psalm 8:1-3 ESV

The first verse of Psalm 8 establishes God’s identity. He is the king and has authority over all so what he says and does matters to everyone. His authority and power are so evident that even babies know God.

The New International Version (NIV) writes verse 2 this way, 

“Through the praise of children and infants you have established a stronghold against your enemies, to silence the foe and the avenger.” Psalm 8:2 NIV

God uses our world’s most fragile and dependent souls to still His enemies. Only God might choose to defy the world’s expectations with His own successful but unexpected battle strategies. God uses the moon and the stars to kindly remind us daily of His presence with consistent messaging. The stars watch over us day and night even though they are only revealed when the sun goes down. God watches over each of us even when we don’t see Him. The moon rises each night without a break. We look up and see God’s power and might displayed with jewels glowing in a dark sky.

Everything in God’s creation makes provision for God’s people. Ancient peoples used these same stars and the moon cycles to:

• Know when to plant crops

• Know where to go

• Know what time it is

• Know when the tides would come and go

This information should fill us with awe. The sky’s regular cycles of stars and moon movement provide predictability in an ever-changing world.

4 what is man that you are mindful of him, and the son of man that you care for him? 5 Yet you have made him a little lower than the heavenly beings and crowned him with glory and honor. 6 You have given him dominion over the works of your hands; you have put all things under his feet, 7 all sheep and oxen, and also the beasts of the field, 8 the birds of the heavens, and the fish of the sea, whatever passes along the paths of the seas. Psalm 8:4-8 ESV

God knew men and women would wonder who they are and what place they have in this world. He generously reveals this critical information. Man is given dominion and authority over all else on earth. All the works of God’s hands, all the birds, all the fish, all the beasts, are under man. Do I take such stewardship seriously? How might this view change how I use natural resources or treat animals?

Man is crowned with glory and honor by God. If I could choose to see each human on earth as someone who is made in the image of God, and “crowned with glory and honor by God,” how might I treat each one differently? Could I cultivate more love and less criticism in my heart based on what God has chosen to do?

9 O LORD, our Lord, how majestic is your name in all the earth! Psalm 8:9 ESV

Psalm 8 finishes as it began by re-stating the facts: God’s name is majestic in all the earth. The verse serves as a matching bookend of praise. God’s reputation has been established and He has all authority. God knew that people, like me who might tend to see the glass half empty, would need such reminders. Today, I praise God for His majestic name, and I lay all I have before His throne.