Ash Wednesday

Ashes, Anguish, and a Pathway to Healing – Psalm 31:1-13

/ Anthea Kotlan / Leave a comment

Lent begins this year on Wednesday, February 22nd. On that day, churches worldwide will host Ash Wednesday services. Ministers will mark the foreheads of the faithful and say,

“Remember that you are dust, and to dust you shall return.” 
Genesis 3:19 ESV

During the forty days of Lent, believers can set aside time to lament their own mortality. In the Bible, the use of ashes signals mourning and loss. Ashes on our skin make inner suffering visible. Christians are reminded that we sin and die because humanity rebelled against God. We must continue to acknowledge this truth.

In Psalm 31, David laments his own suffering as he is relentlessly pursued by King Saul. Examining the first half of this psalm reveals a great deal about prayers of desperation and lament.

1 In you, O Lord, do I take refuge; let me never be put to shame; in your righteousness deliver me!
2 Incline your ear to me; rescue me speedily! Be a rock of refuge for me, a strong fortress to save me!
(Psalm 31:1-2 ESV)

God’s rescue comes about because of His character. What a relief!

God’s refuge is a solid rock of certainty, not an everchanging unreliable aspirational goal. The rescue may not be what I expected, but it always comes in God’s perfect timing.

3 For you are my rock and my fortress; and for your name's sake you lead me and guide me;
4 you take me out of the net they have hidden for me, for you are my refuge.
5 Into your hand I commit my spirit; you have redeemed me, O Lord, faithful God.
(Psalm 31:3-4 ESV)

God’s presence is the refuge. How often do I seek His presence and spend time there?

Suffering and Surrender

Verse 5 might sound familiar. Jesus intentionally echoes David’s words from this psalm as he is about to die on the cross. Jesus would have had many of the psalms memorized, and the crowd would have to. By using this key phrase, He models surrender.

During Lent, many believers spend time considering the suffering of Jesus on the cross. The gravity of our sin required a sacrifice of extreme and prolonged anguish.

Idol Check

6 I hate those who pay regard to worthless idols, but I trust in the Lord.
7 I will rejoice and be glad in your steadfast love, because you have seen my affliction; you have known the distress of my soul,
8 and you have not delivered me into the hand of the enemy; you have set my feet in a broad place.
Psalm 31:6-8 ESV

Before I coast by verse six, I may need to conduct an idol check. I don’t typically feel like bowing down to a large golden cow. So, considering that weirdly specific Biblical allusion, I suppose I’m idol free, or am I?

While I do trust in the Lord, would an inventory of my spent time and treasure reveal some idol influences?

Where do I spend my time?

How do I spend my money?

How do I invest the talents the Lord has blessed me with?

Set aside time to spend alone with the Lord, seeking His wisdom on these questions. Consider asking a trusted friend or family member how she sees these areas in your life.

We live in a society that worships the idol of youth and beauty. People make important life decisions based on public opinion, pleasing the crowd, or external appearances. God looks on our hearts. We all can become obsessed with seeking a life of ease and comfort.  We feel outraged if we believe our rights have been put into question. These goals contradict the transformational call to follow Jesus and carry our cross. We are called to give up our own way, rights, entitlements, and priorities for the sake of the Gospel.

Verse seven reminds me that God sees me and knows my distress and brokenness. In the midst of suffering, knowing that someone sees and knows can help me hang on. A certain isolation weighs so heavily on my heart when I feel like no one understands. Often no human can completely comprehend another person’s journey, but the Lord always can.

Our Bodies Keep the Score

9 Be gracious to me, O Lord, for I am in distress; my eye is wasted from grief; my soul and my body also.
10 For my life is spent with sorrow, and my years with sighing; my strength fails because of my iniquity, and my bones waste away.
Psalm 31:9-10 ESV

Our bodies bear the brunt of trauma and abuse. Years of verbal abuse may result in migraine headaches or other maladies. Sin takes a toll on our physical bodies. (For so much more on this topic, check out this book: The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma by Bessel Van der Kolk, MD)

Neighbor’s Betrayal

11 Because of all my adversaries, I have become a reproach, especially to my neighbors, and an object of dread to my acquaintances; those who see me in the street flee from me.
12 I have been forgotten like one who is dead; I have become like a broken vessel.
13 For I hear the whispering of many— terror on every side!— as they scheme together against me, as they plot to take my life.
Psalm 31:11-13 ESV

When someone in our lives becomes our enemy and seeks to harm us, we expect that person to be a threat. In normal and healthy ways, we draw boundaries and allow that person to experience the consequences of her actions. However, a neighbor’s or friend’s betrayal, inaction, or lack of empathy cuts much more deeply. Social isolation becomes a secondary trauma for those who have been victims of abuse.

Why does this happen?

Recently I heard Rachel Denhollander talk about our call as Christians to bear witness to someone else’s abuse and respond with active compassion. Denhollander warns that this requires so much of us. It is costly and painful. Sadly, the cost is far too great for some, who choose to pull away when others need them most.

How do you respond to those who suffer around you? Do you try to minimize a friend’s experience, or are you willing to be present and sit and hold space for someone to process through a time of grief?

To be able to hold space for others in seasons of suffering, we must seek to be healed ourselves by processing our own trauma and suffering.

Psalm 31 provides a set of prayers for those who suffer. It can provide a way to begin to metabolize grief. In an effort to bring his own brokenness before God, David boldly showed his whole heart to God. Not just the pure and acceptable parts, but he reveals the darkness and the desolation. This is our own path to healing.

Prayers of Desperation

David’s prayers all through the Psalms reveal a willingness to be honest and vulnerable which builds true intimacy in His relationship with God. These steps allow Him to draw near to God on his worst day. When he finds himself trapped, overwhelmed, and hopeless, he hands it to the Lord fully and completely. His prayers are raw without edits or apologies, and ours should be too. He refuses to dress it up as anything other than pure desperation. His heart is failing, and there is no way out in his own strength.

Hope in the Cross

If you can attend an Ash Wednesday service and receive ashes marked in the shape of the cross on your forehead, I encourage you to cling to the hope revealed there.

That cross carries within it an entire story and the foundation of human hope. It is the story of loss and gain, of the incarnation of the truly good one, his glorious life, and triumphant defeat of death. The ashes are not just a reminder of our great failure; but they remind us of God’s victory over sin and death through the life, death, and resurrection of his Son.

Esau McCaulley
Lent: The Season of Repentance and Renewal

How will you navigate the season of Lent this year? What does God have for you in this journey? Lent 2023 begins on Wednesday, February 22nd.

A Mark To Remember -Psalm 103

/ Anthea Kotlan / Leave a comment
(A cross shape on top of ashes)

Photos, awards, a folded American flag, certificates, and various hats revealed a life well-lived in the service of others and God. This table of remembrance, set up near the chapel entrance, displayed things representing my friend’s father’s life. Attending a memorial service brings a stark reminder of what is left behind after someone dies.

What are the only two things that last into eternity?

People and the Word of God

Ash Wednesday (March 2nd) will mark the first day of the 40-day season of Lent and serves as a perfect reminder of this truth. Everything is actively passing away. My physical life on earth, my money, my house, and all my possessions will fade away sooner or later.

The Ash Wednesday service offers, “a chance to kneel and receive the mark of mortal nature,” says Fr. Thomas McKenzie in his book, The Anglican Way.

An Anglican Ash Wednesday service often inserts Psalm 103 into the liturgy. The first seven verses of Psalm 103 begin with praising God and offering perspective.

1 Praise the LORD, my soul; all my inmost being, praise his holy name.
2 Praise the LORD, my soul, and forget not all his benefits—
3 who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases,
4 who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion,
5 who satisfies your desires with good things, so that your youth is renewed like the eagle’s.
6 The LORD works righteousness, and justice for all the oppressed.
7 He made known his ways to Moses, his deeds to the people of Israel:

Psalm 103:1-7 NIV

We can praise God as we begin Lent on this Ash Wednesday because of all the benefits He provides.

  • Forgiveness
  • Healing
  • Redemption
  • Love and compassion
  • Satisfaction
  • Righteousness and Justice
  • Knowledge of His ways and deeds

God warns us not to forget them (vs. 2). Perhaps we need to create a table of remembrance in our own lives on a regular basis to keep these benefits in our minds and our hearts?

How have you seen God provide each one of these gifts recently?

The next seven verses of Psalm 103 may be shared early in the Ash Wednesday service liturgy.

8 The LORD is compassionate and gracious,  slow to anger, abounding in love.
9 He will not always accuse, nor will he harbor his anger forever;
10 he does not treat us as our sins deserve, or repay us according to our iniquities.
11 For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his love for those who fear him;
12 as far as the east is from the west,  so far has he removed our transgressions from us.
13 As a father has compassion on his children, so the LORD has compassion on those who fear him;
14 for he knows how we are formed, he remembers that we are dust.
Psalm 103:8-14 NIV

How have you seen the compassion of the Lord in your life recently?

As the Ash Wednesday service continues, a reading of the Gospel is shared, a sermon is given, and then the priest says,

“Let us now call to mind our sin and the infinite mercy of God.”

A prayer follows.

Almighty God, you have created us from the dust of the earth: Grant that these ashes may be for us a symbol of our mortality and a sign of penitence, that we may remember that it is by your grace alone that we receive the gift of eternal life in Jesus Christ our Savior. Amen.

ACNA BCP 2019 p. 545.

(Anglican Church in North America, The Book of Common Prayer published in 2019.)

Verse 14 is echoed in the liturgy when the priest marks a cross on each participant’s forehead, saying, “remember that you are dust, and to dust, you shall return.”

Such a profound and sobering declaration. This ashen cross marking announces to a watching world both our mortality and penitence as believers.

Psalm 103 continues with eight final verses contrasting our mortality on earth and God’s eternal nature.

15 The life of mortals is like grass, they flourish like a flower of the field;
16 the wind blows over it and it is gone, and its place remembers it no more.
17 But from everlasting to everlasting the Lord’s love is with those who fear him, and his righteousness with their children’s children—
18 with those who keep his covenant and remember to obey his precepts.
19 The Lord has established his throne in heaven, and his kingdom rules over all.
20 Praise the Lord, you his angels, you mighty ones who do his bidding, who obey his word.
21 Praise the Lord, all his heavenly hosts, you his servants who do his will.
22 Praise the Lord, all his works everywhere in his dominion. Praise the Lord, my soul.
Psalm 103:15-22 NIV

When I am reminded of both my mortality and the grace of eternal life through Jesus Christ, all I can do is praise Him. Like the psalmist, I truly want to praise Him with all of my soul.

During the next forty days, whether you attend an Ash Wednesday service or not, why not accept an invitation to Lent.

Lent is not a season of limitation, but instead, it is an amazing opportunity for grace and growth. Lent can be a time of Holy preparation, and an opportunity to create margin in a busy life by giving up something or taking on a life-giving practice. Fr. Thomas McKenzie says, “The disciplines are meant to empty us so the Lord may fill us.”

How will you observe the season of Lent this year?

Do you have any questions about Lent?

“Remember that you are dust, and to dust you shall return.”

/ Anthea Kotlan / Leave a comment

For Mother’s Day last year, I asked for a lemon tree, and my family blessed me with two tiny Meyer Lemon trees. My husband helped me plant each one in a sunny location in our garden, and at once I fancied myself a lemon farmer. However, my trees were small, a little frail and the expected crop of lemons did not come forth. Rather than gorgeous fruit, at around the six-month mark, I spotted evidence of a pest that was systematically dining on the tender leaves and blossoms. Google revealed a plan of action that involved the daily application of a particular oil to each trees’ leaves. This oil must be sprayed on both sides of every single leaf on the tree in order to cause the tiny pests to evacuate. This application must be consistent over the course of about three weeks. Then a weekly maintenance schedule would need to be kept. The Fall season of gardening for me featured many interruptions, and my attempt to eradicate the lemon tree infestation failed miserably. While I managed to beat back the tiny, annoying leaf destroying army, I never actually prevailed. I lacked consistency and focus.

In the middle of January, I attempted a second three-week campaign against the pests that intended to rob me of my Spring lemon crop. Progress was made; however, a Covid-19 diagnosis around day ten of the regimen sidelined my assault for a few days. The eve of Valentine’s Day weekend brought dire warnings from the local weatherman who gleefully predicted single digit temperatures for my tropical area of Texas, just North of Houston. Google warned me that the Meyer Lemon variety in particular do not survive temperatures below 32, so single digits for three days in a row would surely destroy my twin lemon trees. My lemon trees were facing certain peril, and I did not know what to do.

Lent is an open invitation extended to all believers, and this year it begins on Wednesday, February 17th. It’s a forty-day opportunity to draw closer to God and remove things and activities that distract me from putting Him first in my life. Lent is not only about giving up, but it can also be about embracing new disciplines or practices that might help me to grow spiritually. It is in fact a soul tending activity, requiring consistency and focus, that provides a necessary reset. All Christians continually need to renew our repentance and faith. (ACNA BCP 2019 p. 543)

Charles Spurgeon wrote, “Begin as you mean to go on, and go on as you began, and let the Lord be all in all to you.” This is how I must approach Lent this year. I must be intentional in preparing myself and considering what I need to take on and give up in this season. I must begin as I mean to go on. Just like my lemon trees, my soul is in need of intensive, continual care in order to grow.

If I am able to attend an Ash Wednesday service, the priest will say to me, “Remember that you are dust, and to dust you shall return.” I need to be reminded. The smudged cross on my forehead will be an outward and visible sign proclaiming an invitation to a Holy Lent that is extended to all of God’s people in this bleak midwinter.

As for those twin lemon trees, my husband carefully dug them up before the artic plunge, and we brought them inside planted in pots. It will be a bit of a shock for them to be moved; however, having them parked in my living room will surely help me as I try round three of eradicating those tiny leaf munchers. For these lemon trees, intentional care for them could help them survive and even thrive in the midst the polar plunge of 2021.

How will I in turn practice soul care for myself in this season? Am I willing to practice Lent and spend a time of self-examination, repentance, prayer, fasting and almsgiving this year? (ACNA BCP 2019 p. 544) Because I need an intentionally set aside time to prepare for Resurrection Sunday, also known as Easter, on Sunday, April 4th. Just like my little lemon trees, my soul needs daily care. Perhaps, Lent could prove an ideal reset?

Update

I won’t be able to attend a traditional Ash Wednesday service today because my church has had to cancel all services due to unsafe icy road conditions. Our church will offer ash distribution on Sunday when temperatures will rise above freezing. Prayers would be so appreciated for all of us, as many are still without power and water in my area.

“The Book of Common Prayer 2019,” Anglican Church in North America