despair

A Blessing in Despair – Psalm 3

/ Anthea Kotlan / 2 Comments

How can I find blessing in the midst of despair?

Amid the Covid 19 pandemic, in the Fall of 2020, discouragement began closing in on me. Numerous cancellations and endless disappointments piled high. My father, a nursing home resident, had been placed in hospice care. For the first time in my life, none of my family in England could visit, nor could I travel there.

The heavy load of grief threatened to capsize me.

Death

Days after he died, I felt desperate to be with my British family. However, none of that was possible. Regular visits to see my family in England were a fixture in my life. For the first time in my life, going home was no longer possible.

Sadness, grief, disappointment, and fear weighed me down. Would I ever be able to see my extended family again? Looking back now, this seems absurd but at the time, so much in my life felt uncertain. As my father’s only surviving child, I longed to sit with his siblings and share stories about his life.

“The Blessing”

About a week later, I scrolled across a video (“The UK Blessing”) of a group of singers from all over the United Kingdom performing a cover of “The Blessing.”  This song, written by Kari Jobe (and others), struck a deep chord inside me.

The Lord bless you

And keep you

Make His face shine upon you

And be gracious to you

The Lord turn His

Face toward you

And give you peace

Amen, amen, amen

Amen, amen, amen

“The Blessing” by Kari Jobe, et al.

I must have watched and listened to this song on repeat for days. Different groups of people from all over the British Isles sang different portions of the song. Hearing the variety of accents felt deeply meaningful as my family of origin represents people from all over the UK. Seeing the name of each church and recognizing the locations brought back so many memories of home.

He is for you

One verse of this song strengthened my weary heart.

In the morning, in the evening
In your coming, and your going
In your weeping, and rejoicing
He is for you, He is for you
He is for you, He is for you
He is for you, He is for you
He is for you, He is for you

“He is for you.” This truth I needed to hear on repeat.

Surrounded

In Psalm 3, I read about David being surrounded by his enemies. I picture him on the battlefield dodging an oncoming swarm of invaders. Somehow, they slip around and begin threatening him on every side. He cries out for rescue because he knows the Lord is for him.

I am not, and was not, on a military battlefield.

Were David’s enemies found only on the battlefield?

The enemy of my soul would prefer for me to believe David’s opposition was primarily military. Still, time spent in the Psalms reveals how David struggled with various enemies.

  • Physical
  • Emotional
  • Spiritual

Enemies ambushing my heart can be just as dangerous as a physical threat.

Unseen enemies of my soul can wreak havoc on my spiritual life.

Soul Tending Checkup

Perhaps a soul tending check-up is in order today?

 As I examine my heart, what is troubling me?

In this season of my life, who are my enemies?

What strategies does the enemy of my soul use in my life?

  • The harsh voice of my inner critic speaks loudly in the dark of isolation.
  • Temptations to take shortcuts, try quick fixes, and participate in gossip sneak up.
  • My perceptions or snap judgments (this is not fair, they don’t like me, no one is giving me that opportunity) provide a chorus of discouragement and dissatisfaction.
  • Challenges of daily life: missed calls, unexpected repair bills, medical diagnoses
  • Fear, anxiety, and endless uncertainty in a post-pandemic world.
  • Mushroomed misunderstandings start small and rapidly network into a wall of offense built up brick by brick.

How about you?

When I feel surrounded, Psalm 3 can be a powerful prescriptive prayer to examine my soul. A prayer like this can re-align my heart with God’s truth.

1 O Lord, how many are my foes! Many are rising against me;
2 many are saying of my soul. “There is no salvation for him in God.” Selah
(Psalm 3:1-2 ESV)

When I feel surrounded, I lose sight of God’s abundant provision, especially the precious gift of my salvation.

Prayer

Lord, help me to turn to you when I feel surrounded. Please help me to hear your voice and silence the voices of those who accuse me.  

3 But you, O Lord, are a shield about me, my glory, and the lifter of my head.
4 I cried aloud to the Lord, and he answered me from his holy hill.
(Psalm 3:3-4 ESV)

Prayer

Thank you, Heavenly Father, you hear me and protect me. You can lift my head and allow me to gain renewed perspective I don’t have without you. You can always see and hear me from your holy hill.

5 I lay down and slept; I woke again, for the Lord sustained me.
6 I will not be afraid of many thousands of people who have set themselves against me all around. (Psalm 3:5-6 ESV)

Prayer

Lord, I can rest and sleep knowing you are watching over and protecting me. It is far too easy to count up the agents of opposition, but even if a thousand come against me, You are always so much more.

7 Arise, O LORD! Save me, O my God! For you strike all my enemies on the cheek; you break the teeth of the wicked.
(Psalm 3:7 ESV)

Prayer

Lord, thank you for doing battle for and in my place.  I don’t have to figure out how to fight because You do it for me and have such effective battle plans.

8 Salvation belongs to the LORD; your blessing be on your people! Selah
(Psalm 3:8 ESV)

Prayer

Lord, you have given me the gift of salvation. You have put your blessing on me.

In the final two verses of the song, “The Blessing,” says,

May His presence go before you

And behind you, and beside you

All around you, and within you

He is with you, He is with you

In the morning, in the evening

In your coming, and your going

In your weeping, and rejoicing

He is for you

Prayer

While I may feel surrounded by the enemy of my soul, I am surrounded by God’s presence all day and all night, wherever I might go. He goes before me, beside me, and behind me. For this truth, I give thanks today to the Lord. Amen

Here’s the link to listen to the “UK Blessing” on YouTube.

Have You Ever Fallen into a Pit? Psalm 40:1-10

/ Anthea Kotlan / 1 Comment

Pray the promise, not the problem. 

Carlos Whittaker
1 I waited patiently for the Lord; he inclined to me and heard my cry. 

2 He drew me up from the pit of destruction, out of the miry bog, and set my feet upon a rock, making my steps secure. 
Psalm 40:1-2 ESV

The first two verses of Psalm 40 tell a story of redemption. At first glance, it might appear to be a story of a one-time event.  

Have you ever fallen into a pit?  

I have. I have fallen headlong into a pit through my choices and foolishness. Not just once, I might add. If pit falling got added to the Olympics, I might win a medal. Pit falling limits my ability to solve problems or gain a fresh perspective. The view from the bottom of a pit is bleak.  

At the bottom of a pit, I become hyper-fixated on all the problems. I examine the pit walls for footholds so that I can climb out. If the walls prove too slippery due to all that mire, I try ordering some climbing shoes from Amazon. The kind with tiny spikes. Amazon prime tries to solve so many of my problems.  

Other times I have called a friend to tell her about the pit. I treat it like a newscast –live from the pit with Anthea. Meanwhile, I’m googling to find out all about the rocks in the pit. Is there freshwater? What about pit snacks? What is the pit schedule? Do they need tour guides?  

I LOOK DOWN when I focus on the pit (my problems). As Carlos Whittaker wisely suggests, I need to refocus on God’s promises found in the Psalms. In Psalm 40, the psalmist gives thanks for God’s ongoing faithfulness.  

1 I waited patiently for the Lord; he inclined to me and heard my cry. 
Psalm 40:1 ESV

Thank you, God, for hearing me when I pray and cry. Lord, you listen to me, but you turn towards me when I call. Knowing I am seen and heard by You makes whatever I suffer somehow bearable. Help me to wait patiently for You. Your response time is always right on schedule.  

2 He drew me up from the pit of destruction, out of the miry bog, and set my feet upon a rock, making my steps secure. 
Psalm 40:2 ESV

God, You rescued me from the pit. You lifted me and put me on the solid ground of Your provision. Today, I give thanks for this, and I give thanks for no pit being too deep or too miry for You. Even when I am a muddy mess, You love me and will come for me. You place my feet on the firm ground of Your provision. Your plans provide a strong foundation in times of uncertainty. You see and know exactly where I need to be.  

3 He put a new song in my mouth, a song of praise to our God. Many will see and fear, and put their trust in the Lord. 
Psalm 40:3 ESV

Thank you, Lord, for the gift of new songs of praise. Songs never heard before. These unique and remarkable songs stir hearts to turn toward You.  

4 Blessed is the man who makes the Lord his trust, who does not turn to the proud, to those who go astray after a lie! 
Psalm 40:4 ESV

Thank you for blessing me whenever I trust You. When I turn to You and not to those with clever worldly solutions, protected from deception, blessings pour forth when I am close to You.

5 You have multiplied, O Lord my God, your wondrous deeds and thoughts toward us; none can compare with you! I will proclaim and tell of them, yet they are more than told. 
Psalm 40:5 ESV

Lord, expand my ability and influence to share about you with everyone. Shape my words into a bold testimony pointing to You.  

6 In sacrifice and offering you have not delighted, but you have given me an open ear. Burnt offering and sin offering you have not required. 

7 Then I said, "Behold, I have come; in the scroll of the book it is written of me: 

8 I delight to do your will, O my God; your law is within my heart." 
Psalm 40:6-8 ESV

Thank you, Lord, for Jesus’ death on the cross because it set me free from making endless burnt offerings and sin offerings. Help me to walk daily in gratitude for the freedom this provides.  

Help me to delight in obedience and doing Your will. Let me never grow tired of following the guidance you give abundantly. Help me to take into my heart Your laws. Cause me to love what you love and hate what You despise.  
 

9 I have told the glad news of deliverance in the great congregation; behold, I have not restrained my lips, as you know, O Lord. 

10 I have not hidden your deliverance within my heart; I have spoken of your faithfulness and your salvation; I have not concealed your steadfast love and your faithfulness from the great congregation. 
Psalm 40:9-10 ESV

Thank you for every opportunity I have to seek you first and speak about your deeds. May my life be writ large with words and actions proving who You are. Help me to value the gathering of Your people and be faithful in the church you call me to.  

Prayer

God, you are faithful even in the pit. When I climbed in there myself, you still rescued me. You come when I cry to you because you are full of mercy and grace.  

YOU RESCUE ME when I can’t see the ending of a season of suffering. You come and keep company with me and help me go on.  

When my friend or family member walks through the valley of death, you rescue them and me. Not always in the ways, I prayed, but you always do.  

When I am trapped in the pit of despair, you come and sit with me until I see you again.  

I will sing a new song today because praising You does me good.  

I will choose to find delight in your presence and set aside time every day to do that, even when I am too busy.  

Thank you, Lord, you never leave me where you found me. You never give up, even when I try to.  

In Jesus’ name, Amen