soul tending

Featured

What can I do when I face injustice?

/ Anthea Kotlan / Leave a comment

In the summer of 1994, my family was locked in a legal battle in a Houston courtroom with a powerful car manufacturer. Images of David and Goliath sprung to my mind, but our lawyer had no smooth stones or slingshot. His arguments were not enough to cause a jury to vote in our favor. Four long years after my sister was killed, no justice was served.

Once the shock wore off, sadness settled in, and we all went back to the business of grieving her death all over again and caring for her young children.

When faced with injustice, what does God call me to do?

We are called to praise God 

1 We praise you, God, we praise you, for your Name is near; people tell of your wonderful deeds.
(Psalm 75:1 NIV)

Psalm 75 begins with thanksgiving and praise for God’s sovereign rule.

This is counterintuitive to society’s expectations. Many of us have been influenced to believe that we don’t praise until we gain a victory.

Sharing testimonies of God’s wonderful deeds encourages other believers, and in a sense, sharing stories of God’s faithfulness reveals his work. God is always right there beside me, but I often need reminders of his presence. I become distracted by my daily stresses and lose sight of his work in my life. We need to remind one another of God’s continuous gracious interventions, especially when facing injustice.

Praising God does not deny the current circumstance, but it does remind my heart of God’s faithfulness to me and those I love.

We are called to be watching for God’s justice

2 You say, “I choose the appointed time; it is I who judge with equity.
3 When the earth and all its people quake, it is I who hold its pillars firm.
4 To the arrogant I say, ‘Boast no more,’ and to the wicked, ‘Do not lift up your horns.
5 Do not lift your horns against heaven; do not speak so defiantly.’”
(Psalm 75:2-5 NIV)

Every single day, I confront the brokenness of this world. I see those who believe they don’t have to follow the laws of the land. Some of society’s most vulnerable members become victims and cry out for justice.

Are you seeking justice for yourself or a loved one?

We are made in the image of a just God, so we each long for justice to be done here on earth. It is imprinted on our very souls.

In verses 4 and 5, God reassures his people that he not only chooses the perfect time to judge but will do so with balance, insight, and fairness.

Earthly judges may be corrupted or prevented from bringing justice to this world, but God will prevail. That may be now or years from now.

God reminds his people that he holds the foundations of the earth firm even when all is quaking. Notice that the scripture does not say if the earth and people shake. It says when. Sooner or later, we will all experience seasons of uncertainty and lack. But God will hold us close in the middle of the darkest seasons of our lives if we will only look to him.

God identifies the arrogant people, those who defy him, and he commands their obedience sooner or later. There is no escape for them.

We are called to wait on God’s placement


6 No one from the east or the west or from the desert can exalt themselves.
7 It is God who judges: He brings one down, he exalts another.
8 In the hand of the Lord is a cup full of foaming wine mixed with spices; he pours it out, and all the wicked of the earth drink it down to its very dregs.
(Psalm 75:6-8 NIV)

How far is the East from the West? This area covers the entire Earth; therefore, no one can exalt him or herself —only God can do that for a person.

While our society celebrates those who “take what they want” and make “power grabs” for fame and fortune, this is not God’s way. If the manner in which I succeed is questionable, God will not bless my efforts.

Therefore, I shouldn’t try to gain an elevated position because if I do, I won’t be able to stay there. But no force on Earth can remove me if God puts me there.

God knows our hearts, minds, and motivations. He will force the wicked to drink down the full measure of his judgment, and they will have no escape. Can I wait on God’s plan for judgment and justice? Not without his help, every single day.

We are called to persist in praise

9 As for me, I will declare this forever; I will sing praise to the God of Jacob,
10 who says, “I will cut off the horns of all the wicked, but the horns of the righteous will be lifted up.”
(Psalm 75:9-10 NIV)


When I come face to face with the goodness of God, I can’t help but praise Him.

Our praise will go on forever because God will go on forever. This is a glimpse of the now and not yet.

Someday, we will have endless days and nights to praise God in Heaven. We will never get weary but be filled with awe and wonder in his presence.

Psalm 75 begins and ends with praise because God wants to remind us of how he works. Jesus’ death and resurrection brought the ultimate reconciliation between God and man. This will someday pass away, all will be put to right, and real and restorative justice will prevail in all situations. We will live in the new heaven and earth, praise the Lord all day and night, and never grow weary.

All those years ago, my family did not receive a favorable verdict. It seemed that all was lost. Sadly, I don’t have a report of how eventually we prevailed or received what was owed. I have had to choose to release this situation to the Lord. Despite it all, I can praise God, watch for his justice, and await God’s placement.

All was not actually lost that day because despite massive damage to my sister’s car, her two children, aged just four months and not quite two, survived with barely a scratch. I learned during the trial that emergency responders had to use the “jaws of life” to cut my sister’s infant daughter out of her car seat, sitting inches from the full impact of a ¾ ton pickup truck. God miraculously shielded two tiny children that day, and I will be forever grateful to know and love them.

Prayer

We praise you, God, for your Name is near; let us be known as a people who tell of your wonderful deeds and encourage one another. Help us to be those who bear the light of your presence in a dark world where justice can be hard to find and painful to wait for. Help us to wait on you, Lord. In Jesus’ name, amen.

Travel Essentials for Life’s Journey – Psalm 63

/ Anthea Kotlan / Leave a comment

What are your travel essentials?

Psalm 63 reveals a few essentials for our daily travels around the planet Earth. This world is not our home, so it is wise to pack some items to make the journey a little easier.

  • Water bottle
  • Charging Cord
  • Snacks, My Singing Voice, and a Travel Pillow
  • Velcro Straps

Am I at peace with God? We may mentally assent to this, but do we do salvation by bookkeeping? When we try to rebuild our own sense of worthiness, we nullify the grace of God.

-The Rt. Rev. Andrew Williams, Bishop of New England

Recently, I had an opportunity to hear Bishop Andrew Williams speak at the Anglican Leadership Institute at a camp on Martha’s Vineyard. The first week of this intensive training focused on spiritual self-care. As leaders, Bishop Andrew challenged us, “To know Jesus, to know who Jesus really is, to know Him more.”

Psalm 63 echoes a similar message.


1O God, you are my God; earnestly I seek you; my soul thirsts for you; my flesh faints for you, as in a dry and weary land where there is no water.

(Psalm 63:1 ESV)

A Water Bottle for My Soul

Bishop Andrew’s question, “Am I at peace with God?” struck me quite profoundly during my time away at the Institute.

Do I seek the Lord regularly, earnestly, and as if my life depended upon it?

Or do I try to ride out into the “dry and weary land” where I currently reside and get by with no water for my soul? Psalm 63 clearly states how dry and weary this land I inhabit is.

While I would never travel far from home without my refillable water bottle, how often do I deprive my soul of much-needed spiritual water?

Watering my soul involves embracing the grace of God, given generously at significant cost to Jesus. Taking time daily to review these truths reminds me of who I belong to and why. Drinking down cups of living water from God’s word is what truly quenches my soul.

These practices keep me at peace with God. 

2 So I have looked upon you in the sanctuary, beholding your power and glory.

3 Because your steadfast love is better than life, my lips will praise you.

(Psalm 63:2-3 ESV)


A Charging Cord

Beholding God’s power

Beholding God’s glory

To behold is to look at and pay attention. Something changes inside me when I notice God’s power and glory. When I slow down long enough to truly take it all in.

If I forget to plug in my cell phone overnight, I am not surprised when I find my battery is low.

Do I remember to recharge my soul? Or do I wait until I find myself depleted?

A phone charging cord causes power to flow from the power outlet into my phone. It forms the vital link that transfers the essential power into the device. I could put my phone near the outlet. I could even plug in the charger to my phone; however, no charge will be received if the charging cord isn’t plugged into the power outlet.

I must spend time in God’s sanctuary with local believers focused on God’s power and glory. Attending church on Sunday refills my depleted soul. Somehow, doing this in a community amplifies the experience in a way that is hard to explain. Perhaps it is like hearing a song on the radio versus attending a live concert. A Sunday morning service soaks down into my soul.

When I acknowledge God’s steadfast love, a love capable of sticking by my side, I am set free from what Bishop Williams refers to as “salvation by bookkeeping.” I will never do enough to earn God’s love and acceptance. When I strive, my default setting, I attempt to nullify my desperate need for God’s grace. Accepting His steadfast love is better than life because a life of striving will destroy me.

4 So I will bless you as long as I live; in your name I will lift up my hands.

5 My soul will be satisfied as with fat and rich food, and my mouth will praise you with joyful lips,

6 when I remember you upon my bed, and meditate on you in the watches of the night;

7 for you have been my help, and in the shadow of your wings I will sing for joy.

(Psalm 63:4-7 ESV)

Singing, Snacking, and Sleeping 

My soul is designed to be maintained with daily singing, regular meals, and rest. It’s the ultimate soul maintenance plan.

Singing, a mood booster, allows me to praise God, reach out, and be up to Him in new ways. My voice is raised, my arms follow, and I am ushered into the Lord’s presence.

Reading, digesting, and sharing the word of God keeps my soul satisfied and my brain engaged. If I do this every day, then in the middle of the night, I can recall God’s promises. In the darkness, He lights a night light of reassurance that allows me to sleep. Sleep is the ultimate surrender and reminder that God is in control. I can lay my weary head on my travel pillow and know that God watches over me each night.

I can rest in the shadow of His wings and sing myself to sleep.

8 My soul clings to you; your right hand upholds me.

9 But those who seek to destroy my life shall go down into the depths of the earth;

10 they shall be given over to the power of the sword; they shall be a portion for jackals.

11 But the king shall rejoice in God; all who swear by him shall exult, for the mouths of liars will be stopped.

(Psalm 63:8-11 ESV)

Velcro

How do I ensure my soul clings to God?

God promises His right hand will uphold me. He uses supernatural Velcro to help me stay attached and supported by Him. It is not all up to me.

When I travel, I often use various Velcro products to hold my things together, seal packing cubes, and bind up cords and cables to prevent tangling.

I can use Velcro to stick God’s promises into my heart and mind by memorizing them, writing them on index cards, and listening to them read to me.

I must actively repeat God’s truth and cling to it because the world overflows with contrary messages.

The good news, worthy of rejoicing over, is what Bishop Andrew shared in the final part of his talk.

“Jesus cuts the tape of accusation that is playing on a loop. The Lord breathes His love into each of us.”

Prayer

Lord, as I travel through this dry and weary land, you are my guide and provider. Thank you for your living water, recharging power, soul food, rest, upholding right hand, and love breathed into me.
In Jesus’ name, Amen.  

Can I Be Righteously Angry and Not Sin? Psalm 52

/ Anthea Kotlan / Leave a comment

David penned Psalm 52 when he likely felt consumed by grief and outrage. King Saul heard that David had sought prayer and counsel from a priest named Ahimelech. When King Saul learned the news, he ordered the massacre of Ahimelech and all the priests that served with him.

David wrote this psalm directed to Doeg, the Edomite who led the massacre. He had every reason to be angry, but David chose to bring his anger before the Lord rather than executing his version of vengeance.

Vengeance

What do we do when vengeance seems perfectly reasonable? How do we process righteous anger?

1 Why do you boast of evil, O mighty man? The steadfast love of God endures all the day.
2 Your tongue plots destruction, like a sharp razor, you worker of deceit.
3 You love evil more than good, and lying more than speaking what is right. Selah
4 You love all words that devour, O deceitful tongue.
5 But God will break you down forever; he will snatch and tear you from your tent; he will uproot you from the land of the living. Selah
(Psalm 52:1-5 ESV)

Experiencing wrongdoing is inevitable. Whether through outright deception, neglect, broken promises, or betrayal, it takes a toll on our hearts and minds. How should we respond? David vents his anger against Doeg but reminds himself of God’s steadfast love and confronts Doeg’s deception before leaving any reckoning to God. When faced with wrongdoing, do you turn to friends or God and surrender the desire for revenge?

6 The righteous shall see and fear, and shall laugh at him, saying,
7 “See the man who would not make God his refuge, but trusted in the abundance of his riches
    and sought refuge in his own destruction!” 
(Psalm 52:6-7 ESV)

True freedom can be found knowing that God’s just punishment will be displayed for all the righteous. All the wrongs will be brought out into the light. Even those with wealth and status are no match for God’s justice. No wrongdoer will escape.

8 But I am like a green olive tree in the house of God. I trust in the steadfast love of God
    forever and ever.
9 I will thank you forever, because you have done it. I will wait for your name, for it is good, in the presence of the godly.
(Psalm 52:8-9 ESV)

Vitality

Unlike those who seek evil, David compares himself to a green olive tree in the house of God. David chooses to trust in the steadfast love of God forever. He chooses an eternal perspective knowing that God is not limited or bound by time. He decides to sink his roots into God’s soil and remain close to God’s house because these things are vital to growing our faith. He doesn’t want his anger to stagnate his relationship with the Lord. He wants his faith to flourish and produce fruit.

Victory

Once again, as is His habit, David praises and celebrates God before the victory has been realized. He declares God’s righteousness and ability to bring complete justice. He promises to wait, watch, and draw close to God in the waiting time. He stands in complete faith.

How about you?

How will you respond to anger taking up residence in your own heart and mind? It is not a matter of “if” you will ever get angry, but when. Our broken world is packed to the brim with examples of wrongdoing. Perhaps our anger might be even more intense when someone hurts or betrays those we love. Perhaps anger and outrage have become so expected in our society that we no longer believe we need God’s help to tend our souls.

Take time today to process any anger you may have picked up recently. Don’t allow it to fester or slow your growth in the Lord.  Surrender it all just like David did.

Prayer

Lord, I seek your refuge today and know there is a safe space to vent my anger. I can be honest with you and entrust you to bring about what is needed. Help me to grow in my wisdom and love of God. Please use Holy Spirit to cleanse me from all brokenness. Thank you that I can celebrate the victory only You can bring. Thank you that You can and will make all things right.  In Jesus’ name, amen.

Releasing My Measurements – Psalm 39

/ Anthea Kotlan / Leave a comment

“What is the Measure of My Days?”

David begins Psalm 39 with this question.

Sooner or later, every human reaches a point of bewildering uncertainty.

  • Sleepless nights with a newborn –will I ever sleep all night again?
  • A Difficult diagnosis – how can I go on like this?
  • Betrayal – can I ever trust anyone again?
  • Will my wayward family member ever return to God?

The pressure builds inside the heart and mind, and we sit in the darkness of uncertainty, trying to find a sliver of hope.

1 I said, “I will guard my ways, that I may not sin with my tongue; I will guard my mouth with a muzzle, so long as the wicked are in my presence.”
2 I was mute and silent; I held my peace to no avail, and my distress grew worse.
3 My heart became hot within me. As I mused, the fire burned; then I spoke with my tongue:
(Psalm 39:1-3 ESV)

David tries keeping his thoughts and words to himself, but his season of silence does nothing to help him regain peace. He comes to a breaking point. Uncertainty overwhelms him.

We are created to live and grow in community. Yes, even as an introvert –I profoundly know this. Many of us are hardwired for verbal processing. Living in silence amid fearful oppression causes my mind to become overwhelmed and my thinking distorted. A trusted listener can be a balm to a troubled soul. Even when I am not ready to talk it out, I need someone who holds space for me and companionship on my journey.

Perspective

4 “O LORD, make me know my end and what is the measure of my days; let me know how fleeting I am!
5 Behold, you have made my days a few handbreadths, and my lifetime is as nothing before you. Surely all mankind stands as a mere breath! Selah
6 Surely a man goes about as a shadow! Surely for nothing they are in turmoil; man heaps up wealth and does not know who will gather!
(Psalm 39:4-6 ESV)

I desperately need God’s perspective on my life. Sometimes uncertainty brings me to a surrendered place. Letting go of what I always thought it would be like is very hard.

“Sincere hope that the death of ‘how it was supposed to go’ leads to the resurrection of how things are meant to be.”

Lizzie Hoffman

What if the death of my expectations leads to an entirely new life I could never have imagined?

God knew all along with His 360-degree view.

7 “And now, O Lord, for what do I wait? My hope is in you.
8 Deliver me from all my transgressions. Do not make me the scorn of the fool!
9 I am mute; I do not open my mouth, for it is you who have done it. My words cannot defend me. Only you can make a way forward for me.
10 Remove your stroke from me; I am spent by the hostility of your hand.
11 When you discipline a man with rebukes for sin, you consume like a moth what is dear to him; surely all mankind is a mere breath! Selah

(Psalm 39:7-11 ESV)

I feel frustrated if I wait too long for an indecisive coffee customer in line just ahead of me to place her order. I need to get back on the road. My time was wasted.

I know my time is always well-spent when I wait on the Lord. I find myself right where He wants me to be, with an opportunity to feel the anchor of hope keeping me from drifting off course. In my time of stillness, please help me to take an inventory of anything that needs to be cleared out and released.

 

Prayer

12 “Hear my prayer, O Lord, and give ear to my cry; hold not your peace at my tears! For I am a sojourner with you, a guest, like all my fathers.

13 Look away from me, that I may smile again, before I depart and am no more!

(Psalm 39:12-13 ESV)

Lord, thank you that I am your guest. Therefore, I don’t have to provide for myself. I can relax with your generous hospitality. I am grateful to see how my spiritual mothers and fathers have gone ahead of me and set a path for me to follow. Please help me to remember to travel lightly and not settle into this earthly home because I am not a permanent resident. My citizenship is destined for eternity. The measure of my days on this earth will be exactly as you have ordained for me. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Making Room for Repentance

/ Anthea Kotlan / 5 Comments

Psalm 38 offers a liturgy of lament for when it all goes wrong, and the sin is mine.

Those times when I realize I am the one who said or did something causing damage or disappointment to someone else. While I can pull out some handy well-worn excuses, the reality of my sin blares like a stuck car horn on a quiet Saturday morning parked right by the house. The sound of that horn and the implication of what I have done sincerely disturb me.

I would much prefer to skip suffering and leapfrog over lament, but stuffing away guilt and remorse will only lead to more and more damage. Like the psalmist, I require God’s mercy. I need to make room for repentance.

1O LORD, rebuke me not in your anger, nor discipline me in your wrath!
2 For your arrows have sunk into me, and your hand has come down on me.
3 There is no soundness in my flesh because of your indignation; there is no health in my bones because of my sin.
(Psalm 38:1-2 ESV)

Unrepentant Sin leads to Structural Damage

The longer it remains buried under the surface, the more damage it will do to my entire being. I was not designed to carry sin. The weight of carrying it around is too much.

4 For my iniquities have gone over my head; like a heavy burden, they are too heavy for me.
5 My wounds stink and fester because of my foolishness,
6 I am utterly bowed down and prostrate; all the day I go about mourning.
7 For my sides are filled with burning, and there is no soundness in my flesh.
(Psalm 38:4-7 ESV)

Unrepentant Sin’s Damage Quietly Grows under the Surface

When a wound is not cleaned and cleared out, it may fester and cause a noxious odor.

A few months ago, after clearing out a storage unit for a family member, a tiny scratch or abrasion allowed an infection to enter my wrist. Slowly but surely, a hot red patch of skin expanded. I was busy and tried to ignore it. It was painful, but an injury to my hand caused me to miss the signs of a growing infection. I attributed the throbbing pain to a previous sprain. I tried pain patches, hydrocortisone cream, and ice packs, but things only worsened.

Finally, a friend expressed concern and encouraged me to have my doctor take a look. She examined my arm and immediately left the room to fetch an associate to review her findings. Moments later, I was sent to the pharmacy to fill a prescription for a potent antibiotic.

8 I am feeble and crushed; I groan because of the tumult of my heart.
9 O Lord, all my longing is before you; my sighing is not hidden from you.
10 My heart throbs; my strength fails me, and the light of my eyes—it also has gone from me.
11 My friends and companions stand aloof from my plague, and my nearest kin stand far off.
(Psalm 38:8-11 ESV)

Unrepentant Sin Leads to Isolation

God designed me to live in a community with others in mutually beneficial relationships. Unrepentant sin causes me to pull away and hide at a time when I am in the greatest need of support. Sooner or later, I need others to pray for me, encourage me, and offer advice or perspective. Life is hard. Traveling solo leaves me in a spiritual echo chamber.

12 Those who seek my life lay their snares; those who seek my hurt speak of ruin and meditate treachery all day long.
13 But I am like a deaf man; I do not hear, like a mute man who does not open his mouth.
14 I have become like a man who does not hear, and in whose mouth are no rebukes.
(Psalm 38:12-14 ESV)

Unrepentant sin disorientates me and takes my voice

Sound helps orient me on my faith journey. Hearing God’s word daily keeps me on track. Listening to praise and worship music fills me with hope. Sin dulls my appetite for God’s word and leads me to seek escapism in my media choices.  

Unrepentant sin comes between the Holy Spirit and me. I can no longer hear the still, small voice of guidance. Also, I lose my voice when I am not receiving regular replenishment from this promised helper. Doubts crowd my mind. The voice of the accuser is amplified. I get stuck and silent.

Prayer

Lord, I need Your mercy to cleanse me of the things done and left undone that have wronged others and failed You. Order my life in a way that leaves room for regular repentance. Please help me to acknowledge my sins. Send a fresh wave of your Holy Spirit to examine me. Help me repent of every sin and keep me from denial. I pray all of this in the mighty name of Jesus, and I wait for your reply. Amen

Lent and Lament – Psalm 31b

/ Anthea Kotlan / Leave a comment

One essential soul-tending tool might be to practice lament.

In the six weeks or so leading up to Easter, Christians worldwide participate in Lent. It’s a season for believers to take inventory of their spiritual lives. Perhaps a spring cleaning with some lament thrown in for good measure. Some choose to give something up as a way to remember Jesus’ suffering and sacrifice. Others take on specific disciplines like spending more time in prayer, reading through certain portions of scripture, or attending special church services designed to mark the season.

Taking time to lament our personal and corporate sins can be a central part of Lent. Some people even pray about what they have done and what they have left undone.

In the second half of Psalm 31, the psalmist takes an inventory of sorts. Take a few minutes today to participate in personal lament by reading each verse and considering these things.

14 But I trust in you, O Lord; I say, “You are my God.”
15 My times are in your hand: rescue me from the hand of my enemies and from my persecutors!
16 Make your face shine on your servant; save me in your steadfast love!
(Psalm 31:14-16 ESV)

Words said aloud

What we say matters.

What we speak aloud seeps into our bones and shapes our thinking.  

The Psalmist begins with a declaration, “I say, ‘You are my God.’”
He follows this with a cry for the Lord to “Make your face shine on your servant…”. This refers back to the priestly blessing in Numbers 6:24-26.  

As human beings, we were all made to crave being in our Heavenly Father’s presence and having His approval. It is in our original design. Many of us will spend a lifetime trying to please God in our strength. Sadly, we will fail and fail again without accepting Jesus as the only way to our Father.

What can you say aloud to build you up and encourage your spiritual growth?

  • Sing Christian hymns or songs  
  • Read the Bible aloud for a few minutes every day
  • Pray aloud in the car or on a walk using the promises of scripture
17 O Lord, let me not be put to shame, for I call upon you; let the wicked be put to shame;
    let them go silently to Sheol.
18 Let the lying lips be mute, which speak insolently against the righteous in pride and contempt.
19 Oh, how abundant is your goodness, which you have stored up for those who fear you
and worked for those who take refuge in you, in the sight of the children of mankind!
20 In the cover of your presence you hide them, from the plots of men; you store them in your shelter from the strife of tongues.
(Psalm 31:17-20 ESV)

Words heard

What we listen to matters.

The Psalmist begs the Lord to mute lying lips. He requests that the wicked go silently to Sheol. What we listen to affects us more than we realize. Other peoples’ words have the power to weigh us down and teach us things that are not true. We live in a noisy world and can become surrounded by deceptive soundtracks.

Taking time to seek out silence each day can counter the inevitable feelings of overwhelm.

What can you listen to build yourself up spiritually?

  • Refrain from listening to the radio or a podcast during your drive time, and enjoy the silence.
  • Reduce the number of news programs you watch or listen to. Practice extreme discernment on your news sources. Do the anchor people seem angry or prideful?
  • Commit to listening to God’s word daily, even for a few minutes. Please read it to yourself aloud or listen to any of the podcasts or services that read scripture daily. In less than 20 minutes daily, I have listened to the entire Bible in one year.
21 Blessed be the Lord, for he has wondrously shown his steadfast love to me when I was in a besieged city.
22 I had said in my alarm, “I am cut off from your sight.” But you heard the voice of my pleas for mercy when I cried to you for help.
23 Love the Lord, all you his saints! The Lord preserves the faithful but abundantly repays the one who acts in pride. 
24 Be strong, and let your heart take courage, all you who wait for the Lord!
(Psalm 31:21-24 ESV)

Things that were done and left undone

Have you asked for help lately?

Asking for help requires a certain level of humility and vulnerability. Too often, I am more ready to problem-solve than cry out to God for help.

He hears us and is so ready to send us aid.

In verse 23, the psalmist calls out the “one who acts in pride.” She might be someone who relies on her strength, leans on her courage, and requires her own schedule to be kept.

The Lord calls us to be found waiting for Him. Waiting for Him to answer us, aid us, and make provision. Do I sometimes miss His ideal solution because I have tried to run ahead and make my own way?

The Lord calls us to “take courage” as we wait on Him because He is willing to give it to all of us.

Prayer

Lord, thank you that you hear my cries for help and always answer. Please help me to wait on your way and your timing. Please help me to complete the assignments you have given to me. Please open my eyes to things I may lose sight of that are essential to you.  May I glorify you with the words I say? May I honor you with what I listen to? Please give me wisdom and discernment in all of these areas. In the name of Jesus, Amen.

What are you looking for? Psalm 121

/ Anthea Kotlan / 2 Comments

Whatever you look for, you will see.

Annie F. Downs

What are you looking for this Advent Season?

  • Hope
  • Peace
  • Joy
  • Love

Those are the four themes of Advent, but all too often, I am looking for:

  • Disappointment
  • Conflict
  • Despair
  • Indifference

I don’t think I ever intended to look for these opposites of the Advent themes, but it is all too easy to allow my perfectionism to fixate on disappointment. I somehow missed the mark in getting something done or meeting someone else’s needs. When conflict arises, and it always will this side of Heaven, I am quick to despair. When I feel that all hope is lost, it is easy to pick up an attitude of indifference as a coping tool.  

Wherever I focus my attention, I will find exactly what I am looking for. If I focus on how things don’t seem to be working out the way I had hoped, I would see that in overflow.

Psalm 121 directs me to look up to the hills. Since I live in the flatlands of East Texas, I must look up to the sky instead and seek the Lord.

Take a few minutes today to meditate on the truths contained in Psalm 121 by reading each verse and declaring the truth revealed there.

1I lift my eyes up to the hills. From where does my help come? 
2My help comes from the Lord, who made heaven and earth.
(Psalm 121:1-2 ESV)

He Sees It All

He sees you at all times and in all situations because He has the ultimate vantage point and a 360-degree perspective.

There is nothing outside of His authority because He made it all.

3He will not let your foot be moved; he who keeps you will not slumber. 
4 Behold, he who keeps Israel will neither slumber or sleep.
(Psalm 121:3-4 ESV)

He Never Sleeps on the Job

He won’t fall asleep on the job and leave you vulnerable. Ever vigilant, your Heavenly Father won’t lose track of your wandering ways.

5The LORD is your keeper; the LORD is your shade on your right hand. 
6 The sun will not strike you by day, nor the moon by night. 
(Psalm 121:5-6 ESV)

He is a Keeper and a Needs Filler

He is keeping up with you and providing what is most needed. He gives shade on a summer day, an umbrella when it rains, or a snack when you are hungry. You are heard and seen by your beloved Father. He may not give you everything you want, but He will provide for your needs.

7 The LORD will keep you from all evil; He will keep your life. 
8 The LORD will keep your going out and your coming in, from this time forth and forevermore. 
(Psalm 121:7-8 ESV)

He Monitors

The LORD of the universe is keeping track of me. He knows when I go out and when I return home. He does not lose track of me, even when I lose track of Him. He is always only a whispered prayer away.

Prayer

Lord, help me to look to you in these final days of 2022. Guide me to continue focusing on You and not my mistakes or misfortunes. Thank you that as I focus on You, You reveal more of Yourself to me. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Up and Vanished – Psalm 12

/ Anthea Kotlan / 2 Comments

True Crime

People spend hours gathering clues, noting evidence, and hearing interviews from favorite true crime podcasts and documentaries. What draws people to listen to this content that continues to grow in popularity?

Mysteries grab our attention, and we all desire to solve puzzles. It is thrilling to dive into a great escape and try to track down a criminal.

Nancy Drew’s mysteries drew me into sleuthing at an early age. She was fierce, fearless, and willing to do almost anything to crack the case. Years later, I graduated to suspense mysteries from Sue Grafton and DiAnn Mills. Those books can be hard to put down.

Psalm 12 begins with a mystery and a desperate cry for help.

1 Save, O LORD, for the godly one is gone; for the faithful have vanished from among the children of man. (Psalm 12:1 ESV)

Vanished

The word grabs the reader and catches in the throat. It conjures up the idea of someone being here one minute and gone the next. What is it like to live in a world where all the godly have disappeared?  

They must have been there at one time. The landscape is bleak and dark, and the psalmist feels abandoned.

Deception


2 Everyone utters lies to his neighbor; with flattering lips and a double heart they speak. 
(Psalm 12:2 ESV)


Lies pop up everywhere.  

Can we expect anyone to tell the truth?

Do people owe us the truth?

Is there more deception now than before?

In our current age, the rise of fake news and the conflict it has led to has created trauma for so many. Deception puts us all on edge. In reality, false information has been spread since the dawn of time.

Thousands of years ago, when Jesus rose from the dead, their superiors instructed the Roman soldiers to carry out a fake news campaign to discredit this report.

Here, the psalmist calls attention to some particularities about the lies surrounding him.

Lies between neighbors who should watch out for each other.

Lies from lips that seek to deceive and flatter.

Lies from the “double-hearted” are those who say one thing and do another.

A lie from a stranger is complex, but deception caused by those who live in our community feels particularly painful. Someone who seeks to manipulate us with kind words intended to build us up loses all our trust when the truth is revealed. Someone who tells you one thing directly and then does the opposite leaves you doubting yourself. Did I misunderstand?

A Plea for Justice

3 May the LORD cut off all flattering lips, the tongue that makes great boasts,
4 those who say, “With our tongue we will prevail, our lips are with us; who is master over us?” (Psalm 12:3-4 ESV)

The psalmist calls out to God for justice.

Words have power. Threatening words, boastful claims, and media campaigns prove to be a force that brings destruction, risks, and danger.

Tongues may appear to prevail, but God will act.  

God’s Protection Program


5 “Because the poor are plundered, because the needy groan, I will now arise,” says the LORD; “I will place him in the safety for which he longs.” (Psalm 12:5 ESV)


God responds to injustice, and He answers with a promise. He will place his people in the safety that they long for.

Is that safety found in a physical location? Sometimes, God calls us into His protective presence, where He will refresh us to endure. Other times, He chooses to relocate us to a better place.



6 The words of the LORD are pure words, like silver refined in a furnace on the ground,
    purified seven times.
7 You, O LORD, will keep them; you will guard us from this generation forever. (Psalm 12:6-7 ESV)


Sometimes, God calls us into His protective presence, where He will refresh us to endure. Sometimes, He chooses to relocate us to a better location. He will guard us either way.

His word, pure and refined, strikes a contrast to the deceptive terms of the world. Spending time in God’s word gives us refuge.

Sin Cycles

8 On every side the wicked prowl, as vileness is exalted among the children of man. 
(Psalm 12:8 ESV)

This final verse of Palm 12 reveals the cyclical nature of sin. It does come back around and around. When society as a whole permits evil to grow, it will. It is much like a weed in our garden reappearing even after it has been rooted out. Only God can permanently eradicate sin through the sacrifice of His son, Jesus.

Someday, God will prevail, and Jesus will rule over the Kingdom, and we will inhabit a new heaven and earth and no longer suffer under the tyranny of evil.

Prayer

 God, your words and promises are pure, like silver refined in a furnace on the ground,
 purified seven times. Thank you for the fact that there is no fake news from you. You, O Lord, will keep promises and guard your people forever. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Do you have time for a conversation? Psalm 9b

/ Anthea Kotlan / 4 Comments

During my season of parenting teenagers, there was one thing I could always count on — inconvenient conversations.

Just as I was nodding off or felt beyond exhausted, one of my teens chose to begin a meaningful conversation. Suddenly, words poured forth freely, and the opportunity to truly connect arrived. These conversation opportunities opened up to me late at night, when we were running late, or just as someone else was about to arrive at our house.

Every single time.

When I paused and took the time to listen, I was always rewarded with new insight and connection. Sometimes, I was too focused on my agenda and failed to do this well.

Ironically, things don’t change much when you are parenting young adults. Chances are good, they will call you when you don’t have time to talk. Taking that time anyway will bless you, I promise.

God calls us into conversations that might not always fit into our ideal schedules.

Have you ever noticed how the book of Psalms is formatted as a call and response or a conversation with God? Psalm after Psalm draws our hearts into dialogue with Him. He leads, and we can follow. But do I miss some of these fantastic ways to connect? Do I always answer God’s calls?

In the second half of Psalm 9, David reminds me to praise the LORD.

11 Sing praises to the LORD, who sits enthroned in Zion! Tell among the peoples his deeds!
12 For he who avenges blood is mindful of them; he does not forget the cry of the afflicted.
(Psalm 9:11-12 ESV)

God calls us to a conversation with Him and then with each other in our community.

How might my daily conversations with others look and sound different if I started each day by talking to God first? Beginning each day with praise would likely lift my spirits and fill me with resilient joy.

“Tell among the peoples his deeds” is a repeated phrase in the Bible. As God’s people, we are commanded to share our testimonies about how He has worked in our lives. God requires this activity because testimonies shared in the community nourish and strengthen our souls. We need stories of God’s faithfulness to help us remain faithful in difficult times.

13 Be gracious to me, O LORD! See my affliction from those who hate me, O you who lift me up from the gates of death,
14 that I may recount all your praises, that in the gates of the daughter of Zion I may rejoice in your salvation. (Psalm 9:13-14 ESV)

God calls us to honest conversation with Him.

Telling God about my suffering and what is troubling me provides a healthy and safe release for my concerns. He is always ready to listen.

Just as He listens to me, I must leave space to hear from Him. All too often, my prayers sound like a monologue. I must intentionally pause and leave room to listen to hear from Him.

Recounting the praises of God serves to remind me about who He is in my life. A wonderful recounting praises exercise is to work through the alphabet using each letter as a personal praise prompt.

A – I serve an almighty God

B- God’s love is boundless

C- God’s care for my loved ones and me is beyond my understanding.

Can you get to Z? Here’s a link to print out a praise list to begin your day.

praises-a-to-zDownload

15 The nations have sunk in the pit that they made; in the net that they hid, their own foot has been caught.
16 The LORD has made himself known; he has executed judgment; the wicked are snared in the work of their own hands. Higgaion. Selah
17 The wicked shall return to Sheol, all the nations that forget God.
18 For the needy shall not always be forgotten, and the hope of the poor shall not perish forever.
(Psalm 9:15-18 ESV)

God calls us to a conversation with those in need.

Who are the needy? We all are sooner or later.

`

I was congratulating a friend on completing a particularly rigorous program. We discussed the new job she had been offered. Much to my surprise, I realized I had stepped into her season of significant loss. While she had achieved a big goal, her heart’s desire was denied again. The very thing she had worked toward had slipped just out of reach. The new job offer felt to her very much like a consolation prize.

How could I respond to someone sitting in loss?

When I see a person experiencing a time of suffering due to disappointments stacked high, how can I leave room for her to express her story?

It’s far too easy for me to reframe it or deny it. This creates a comfortable distance for me. I don’t wish to think of or see unfairness or suffering up close.

“Helpful” phrases spring to my lips, “It’s not that bad.” “God will work it out.” While there could be a ring of truth to these responses, they are designed to make me feel better, not her.

Could I make space for this woman to feel what she feels and tell her story as it currently is, not as we all wish it were?

Lord, help me to do this better.

Sooner or later, we will all experience seasons of need and poverty. In those times, it feels almost impossible to cling to hope. In verse 18, God promises that disappointment will not be our permanent residence. We will see restoration.

19 Arise, O LORD! Let not man prevail; let the nations be judged before you!
20 Put them in fear, O LORD! Let the nations know that they are but men! Selah
(Psalm 9:19-20 ESV)

God calls us to conversations with Him first, then ourselves, and finally, with a watching world.

If you have watched the news lately, we might agree that some nations, and more importantly, their leaders, must be reminded of their actual status.

We can pray for bad leaders to fear the LORD and realize they are merely men (flawed humans in need of God’s redemption) and not all-powerful despots able to swallow up other nations. Even when these leaders don’t acknowledge the LORD, He will arise.

Some days I am preaching the truth of God’s word and His promises to my own heart and mind. I struggle with anxiety and can become overwhelmed by the constant onslaught of crises communicated in the 24/7 news cycle.

When someone expresses fear, how do I respond? Do I try to outdo a report of doom with my update? Or do I describe the certainty that God will make things right?  

Now, perhaps more than ever, as believers, we can begin each day with intentional soul-tending.

  • We are setting aside time in our schedule to soak in God’s word.
  • Listening for His voice and intentionally leaving space and time to listen.
  • Praising Him.
  • We are speaking to Him before we talk to others.
  • I was listening to others and allowing the margin for them to express sadness.
  • We were peppering our conversations with others with gentle reminders of the character of God.

Do you take time for conversations? I would love to hear how you bring this into practice in your own life.

Can I Cultivate Thanksgiving? Psalm 9a

/ Anthea Kotlan / 1 Comment

When I was a little girl, the days spent between Christmas and New Year were filled with the arduous task of writing thank you notes. Looking back now, less than ten notes to write loomed large over those days. For my sister and me, the challenge felt overwhelming.

 I sat for hours at the dark wood desk in my room with the leather inlay carving out words with my blue ballpoint pen. The lightweight air mail paper made my penmanship even more difficult. Ink smeared over the words I crafted. I struggled to complete each note.

Cultivating Gratitude

My mother knew that cultivating an attitude of gratefulness required application. To feel thankful, putting pen to paper reinforces and acknowledges what has been received.

In Psalm 9, David begins his psalm with an order to write thank you notes to the LORD. While these notes do not have to be handwritten on airmail stationery, listing and “recounting” what God has done for us builds up gratefulness in our hearts and minds.

I must confess to a certain degree of pessimism in my own heart. Naturally, I lose sight of all I have received. Sometimes I need to cultivate an attitude of gratitude by making a list.

1 I will give thanks to the LORD with my whole heart; I will recount all of your wonderful deeds.
2 I will be glad and exult in you; I will sing praise to your name, O Most High. 
(Psalm 9:1-2 ESV)

Listing off the Lord’s wonderful deeds will lead to wholehearted praise and a much-needed perspective shift for me.

3 When my enemies turn back, they stumble and perish before your presence.
4 For you have maintained my just cause; you have sat on the throne, giving righteous judgment. (Psalm 9:3-4 ESV)

Currently, I am traveling through a season of challenges regarding some financial matters—one of those times when my responsibility intersects with someone else’s mistakes. Today, I will choose to claim verse 4 as a promise. “For you have maintained my just cause; you have sat on the throne, giving righteous judgment.” This lifts the crushing pressure to fight for my rights off my shoulders. The Lord maintains my just cause day and night. He will prevail in His perfect timing and in His ideal manner.  

See the Everlasting Ruins

5 You have rebuked the nations; you have made the wicked perish; you have blotted out their name forever and ever.
6 The enemy came to an end in everlasting ruins; their cities you rooted out; the very memory of them has perished.
(Psalm 9:5-6 ESV)

How many times have we visited ancient and historical ruins and marveled about how a king or a country had so much in the world’s eyes, and then it was all taken away? During a visit to Israel a few years ago, I saw this time and time again.

Does the Lord leave “everlasting ruins” behind to remind us how much power He has? I believe those ruins stand as a testimony to His might and abilities. We are forgetful people who need visual cues.

7 But the LORD sits enthroned forever; he has established his throne for justice,
8 and he judges the world with righteousness;   he judges the peoples with uprightness.
(Psalm 9:7-8 ESV)

In whatever situation I find myself in, it is always comforting to be reminded of the Lord’s position in my life and the world. He is on the throne. He has authority in my life and the world around me. While the world appears to be spinning out of control, especially lately, He is still sitting in authority over it all. He will make a final judgment someday when Jesus returns to rule for eternity.

Try Hiding in God’s Stronghold

9 The LORD is a stronghold for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble.
10 And those who know your name put their trust in you, for you, O LORD, have not forsaken those who seek you.
(Psalm 9:9-10 ESV)

In the meantime, when I feel utterly overwhelmed by it all, I can withdraw into His presence, a stronghold. Because I know His name, I can put my trust in Him. Sometimes it becomes a daily challenge and even an hourly challenge. Spending time in God’s stronghold might look different for each of us. For me, it is choosing to sing songs of praise or sitting quietly and listening for His voice of reassurance. Sometimes, getting outside in nature tends to my soul by exposing me to God’s creation. Time spent in God’s presence brings a reset to my soul and renews my mindset.

Prayer

Lord, I choose to begin with thanksgiving. I will decide to make a list of all You have done and provided for me.

Lord, I choose to see the everlasting ruins You have provided to remind me of Your power. All the while, I will look up to seeing you enthroned forever.

Lord, today I choose to take a few minutes or even hours to hide in Your presence. Usher me into your soul-tending presence as I commit to sing praises and recall Your marvelous deeds.

In Jesus’ name, Amen.